Ashamed to ask - any other smokers out there?

[jcdamon3]

Who said coffee was bad for you? They are saying it is good for you now!

Have your coffee and quit smoking (when you can).

I can't say much else on this thread without pissing a bunch of people off so I will just shut up now.

From an ex-smoker

[Hallanole]

I was never actually saying coffee was bad. I was using it as an example that almost everyone can relate too.

[jcdamon3]

Thanks for the post KK. An excellent story to share. I too smoked for awhile and found it easy to quit. I don't think that we represent the normal case though. I don't know why it was easy for me other than I don't think it had worked it's way into my lifestyle, it sort of made me sick, and my boyfriend at the time didn't smoke, but could smell it on me.

I like the smell of a cig when it first lights up but only in very low doses. My sinuses and allergies just don't allow me to tolerate the stuff. I sneeze now when exposed to smoke.

I think one of the reasons why people don't quit is because they try once and it is too difficult. I believe that you have to try over and over again until you get it right.

My grandmother too quit after smoking for 60 years and only did it because the doctor told her if she didn't she would die.

So the guilt thing is the thing that I am going to disagree with. I never understood why people think guilt is such a bad thing. Your guilt is just that voice inside of you telling you that your actions don't match up with your intentions. So if you guilt is telliing you to call Aunt Bess, start the laundry, or quit smoking, why is this bad? If you family is making you feel guilty it is probably because they love you and hate seeing you hurt yourself.

My brother in law who is now over 50 and has smoked since a teenager is starting to have many, many smoking related issues. Yes, smoking hurts more than just your lungs and I watch as his health goes downhill. I never say anything to him.

Now will I feel guilty when he dies of some smoke related disease. Yes, because I never said anything to him. I am going to be kicking myself. Maybe I should start bugging the sh*t out of him.

[Julie08]

I agree that guilt is totally underrated. It is a good thing if used to change your behavior for the better. I just prefer the kind that comes from your own sense of right/wrong, not the kind that comes from other people's sanctimonious judgments of what you are doing -- especially when they are doing worse things themselves! And if you are not going to change your behavior, you will just wreck your health more if you are eaten up by guilt while puffing away.

Like KK, when I quit, it was cold turkey and without fanfare. It had been bubbling inside my subconscious for sometime, I guess, but why I finally decided to do it when I did, I don't really know. (kind of like thinking about getting braces for a long time, then all of the sudden deciding you are finally going to do it!) I also don't know why quitting smoking worked that time when it hadn't previous times. I think I just got sick of making excuses to myself - life will always be stressful, I finally understood there will never be a perfect time to quit. I have heard that the average smoker quits several times before they are finally successful. Quitting is easy - staying quit is hard! I guess the key is to keep doing it. And once you do manage to quit, to think of yourself as a "recovering smoker" rather than a non-smoker so you don't fool yourself into thinking you can have "just one." I have friends who actually do smoke a couple times a year and don't make a habit of it. I thought I could do that, too. Wrong! I wish I was that kind of person, but I was just lying to myself and was back to a pack a day in no time. I finally had to tell myself that I'm just not allowed to smoke any more.

Like KK - I still sometimes like the smell of a fresh lit cigarette. Not enough to smoke one myself. But if I live to be 80, I may start smoking again. I figure by the time it catches up with me, I'll probably already be dead from something else!

[Clo]

Hi,

some years ago, my dad died because of lung cancer and cardiovascular
issues. My uncle died because of cardiovascular diseases too. Both
because they smoked for a long time. Now another family member is
having her second surgery. Also she has severe cardiovascular issues, as
a direct result of smoking. So I have seen how smoking shortens one life
with many years, and the last years they had were not that great too. You
should have seen my dad, dying as he was literally suffocating. This is
something one never forgets. So, smoking kills. But smoking also take
away slowly one's, how should I say this, "life strength". When you are
young, you have plenty of such strength. If you loose 10 pct, you will
hardly notice this. But if you get older, or if you get one or another serious
disease, then these 10 pct will really matter. And life may be a game after
all, the respawning (rebirth) so typically for computer games is not yet
invented in real life. When it is over, it is over for ever ...

[SHORTIN1]

I've smoked for most of my life, I began at an early age. I have quit twice in the past, the longest time being 15 months. I no longer beat myself up about it, there are enough other people to do that.
I would never encourage anyone to smoke, it would be wonderful if we could all quit, but it's important to remember that smoking is a health issue not a moral issue. (An Aunt of mine actually left the church she attended for years because smokers could no longer teach or supervise childrens activities) I had a dear friend that used to always be so down on herrself for smoking. At the age of 34 she had a terrible accident involving a train. She died of course. And she was worried about smoking!

[jcdamon3]

And once you do manage to quit, to think of yourself as a "recovering smoker" rather than a non-smoker so you don't fool yourself into thinking you can have "just one." I have friends who actually do smoke a couple times a year and don't make a habit of it. I

I think this is so true. I wish there were more programs for people to quit. We have programs for Alchoholic, etc, I think that people consider it a bad habit instead of an addiction.

I would never encourage anyone to smoke, it would be wonderful if we could all quit, but it's important to remember that smoking is a health issue not a moral issue. (An Aunt of mine actually left the church she attended for years because smokers could no longer teach or supervise childrens activities)

I think smoking absolutely can be a moral issue IF you know that your second hand smoke can hurt someone else and you expose them to it anyway. Particularly kids, since kids don't have a voice.

My grandmother exposed all us kids to smoke for years and years but back then we didn't know the dangers. Now we do and there is no excuse any more.

I doubt that your Aunt was smoking in front of the kids. The fact that she is a smoker should not mean that she cannot supervise kids. If she is smoking in front of the kids then I think the church did the right thing.