Reassurance Needed!

[Skylark]

Hiya,

I get ceramic uppers in two weeks (2nd Jan) and to be honest I'm completely dreading it and wondering if I made the right decision.

I am luckier than a lot of you on here because I only have to have uppers and hopefully only for 6 months, but I'm worried about how it will affect my self esteem. I reckon they'll be pretty obvious as my teeth are very visible when I talk and smile.

Although outwardly confident I'm actually pretty self conscious, and hated having braces the first time round. It doesn't help that not many adults seem to have braces in the UK and my friends are more baffled than supportive of my decision. My teeth are not horrific - only a couple of teeth really out of place, but my bite one one side is pretty bad.

The main reason I saw the orthodontist in the first place was because my teeth are becoming more crooked by the week (I originally had braces 10 years ago and have been pretty good about wearing the retainer but they are still desperate to move) I just wanted him to fix them in place and was not prepared to be told about my bite and that I really should have braces again.

Thing is, my bite will still not be perfect unless i have lowers and elastics too, but the ortho seems to think that there will still be a great improvement with just uppers (on one side all the bite pressure is on one upper tooth and that would be fixed). If I had a very crooked smile I guess I'd be happier to go for it as the improvement would be dramatic but I'm just wondering whether it's actually worth it for an improved bite and slightly better smile.

It really is just the self esteem issue that I'm worried about. Yes I remember it hurting a lot in the first few days but I can deal with that.

Luckily I have a kind and supportive boyfriend, but I still feel really isolated as no one actually has any clue what a big deal it is for me.

I need to get it back in perspective but I don't know how. At the moment I feel that I will have to retire from society with a bag over my head! But most people on here are so positive - how do you do it???

Help!

Pics if you're interested: http://i129.photobucket.com/albums/p221 ... 1166697050
http://i129.photobucket.com/albums/p221 ... 1166696959

[Skylark]

Thanks for your reply kk! I really don't feel ready, but I know that if I bail out then I'll be really disappointed in myself and still have increasingly crooked teeth. I just took a pic of the inside of my uppers and put it on the first post - it's the first time I've seen that angle close up and they do look more crooked than I thought.

How can I get the positive attitude that so many people seem to have on here? All I can think of is that I'll have a miserable and self conscious 6 months!

[Skylark]

You're right Meryaten, this site is brilliant for support - in fact, it's the reason that I decided to go for it in the first place! And it's great to see everyone so funny and positive about it! It's just that I'm apprehensive and would really like some of this encouragement from friends (boyfriend and ortho are great but everyone else just seems to wonder why I'm doing it).

I'm hoping that waiting for it all to get started is the worst part.....

[acd]

In two months I have had a total of three people say anything to me about my braces and all were positive comments. It is a much bigger deal to you than it is to anyone else. If you're not happy with your teeth then go for it. My biggest regret is that I did not do this sooner and wouldn't have spent the past 25 years hating my teeth and not smiling for pictures.

[Brunoise]

Go for it Skylark!!!! You can do it!!! I agree with the posters above, even when you are shakey inside, just pretend to be rock solid. The pretending can get you over the rough spots.

Your teeth are going to look fantastic and then you will feel even MORE confident when it is over.

Only two weeks to go!!!! I will be getting my braces right behind you by another couple of weeks so we will be simpaticos for those six months.

[platinum]

Same kind of problems here...
I would get titanic brackets (very ugly) on my upper and lower teeth.

I send a picture of titanium brackets to my boyfriend and asked if he would wear them. He said NO because they are ugly. Then I said that wouldn't he find good that I would get less attention from other guys... He was then like "they are lovely"
I do get a lot of attention from guys, which annoys me. I do not look like a super model but a kind of cute .


I am still thinking if I should go for those ugly braces for 20 months. But there is a possibility that I can swop to invisalign after the worst part has been fixed

[lionfish]

I'm hoping that waiting for it all to get started is the worst part.....

It is. I agonised for 35 years over doing something and finally committed to treatment on 24 Dec last year - so almost a year ago to the day. I can tell you that the 7 week wait to get started was one of the most anxiety ridden times of my life!

I started with less visibility than most (lingual uppers, ceramic lowers), but with elastics top to bottom and two of them in a prominent position, that's gone out the window. Most people say nothing, those that do are usually parents of kids with braces or people who have had braces themselves. Comments are almost always sympathetic. In the early days, my OH went on in public about how I'd end up looking like Julia Roberts. He thought it was funny, I did not. It took 2 reprimands to get him off this topic (a third time and I would have locked the fridge).

Positive atttitude is everything. I went into this saying to myself, "it's going to work and it's not going to stop my life".

And best of all, this is a period where you will really appreciate time flying. And it does!

Good luck with it all.

[wonderstuf]

Some help putting it in perspective: The time will pass whether you get braces or not. Six months will fly by so quickly! I've also found (as KK and others have said) that -- seriously -- everyone else has so much going on in their lives that there's simply no room for them to analyze your orthodontic situation as well.

And really, six months? Consider yourself lucky!

[platinum]

One should also think that even if people are here talking how it is going to be OK etc. to have braces, they do not generally look good...
Just to say that you would not get a major shock after they are on.

I know that I am going to look quite stupid. And I am still wondering if I should go ahead...

[Joanna20]

Hi there!
First of all let me introduce myself: I’m Joanna, I’m 21 and I’ve been braced since June 2006. About a year ago I became concerned with the way my teeth looked. I was always telling myself that I would never wear fixed braces again… I just wanted a retainer, or a removable appliance. Right. I had my first consultation on Valentine’s day and I was fully braced by June. I was left with two choices: Crooked smile forever or fixed metal braces for a couple of years and a perfect smile forever. I mean, I didn’t really had a choice ‘cause as soon as I entered my ortho’s office she told me I really needed braces. My gums were starting to show my roots… that’s how bad they were.
I have had braces before and that’s why I really didn’t want braces this time. I was a teenager back then so I was teased, not to mention my teeth couldn’t be fixed without extractions witch means that those 2 and a half years in braces meant nothing (well almost). Not to mention that, despite the crooked teeth I grew cute and was used to being the centre of attention all the time… how could I deal with braces?
At first it was a bit hard, I must admit. But now I’ve gotten so used to them that I barely notice I have them, and some people have actually told me that they look good on me (and I haven’t even had my upper extractions yet!). Once I have them and the upper teeth move backwards a little bit I will smile all the time. The more time goes by the better you will feel. Plus if it’s six months for you then that’s nothing.
6 months will fly by, whether you have braces or not. So why not do it? You have a supportive boyfriend, that’s just awesome.
A lot of us here in the boards are single and I think were all dealing with it just fine. My friends and family aren’t very supportive at all. But I didn’t care and I still don’t care because I know I’m doing the best for me. Who are they to tell you what you should or shouldn’t do?!

I’m blessed because I don’t have any bite issues, I was starting to have an underbite in my incisors (the lowers were hitting the upper incisors) and that was hard enough to deal with. So I think you should sort that out.

You are already braced. Just think about all of the people who don’t have enough money to do this. They will have bite issues and a lower self esteem forever… and there is nothing they can do.

If I were you I’d keep the braces! Maybe you should start a story here, and just vent on it, even if it’s just self esteem issues, we’ll read it and make you feel better.

Good luck with everything,

Joanna

[LadyTr0uble]

Don't worry, Skylark. It's been one month, 3 days and 2 adjustments, and all people ever ask me is: why are you talking funny? I have ceramic top and bottoms, unless someone really looks, they aren't really going to notice, and they don't show up in pictures (they onlyshowed up in 2 of the up close pix I took on vacation). And 6 months are going to fly by. Think about the beautiful smile you are going to have.
I was scared that people are going to laugh, but I have not have one person make fun of me yet (the bf who lovingly calls me "microchips" and threatens to take out the magnets when I push my luck doesn't count). Most people who have had braces, or have kids going through it, would remind me of how it's worth it. you will get nothing but encouragement, or respect (from those who are too chicken to go through with it) from grownups... it's no longer the schoolyard.
PS-An old friend told me last night that the braces just took 10 years off my appearance!

[lionfish]

PS-An old friend told me last night that the braces just took 10 years off my appearance!

10 years? Great! I hope it does that for me and turns my hair colour back to its original as well!!

[Skylark]

Thanks for your encouraging replies folks! The site stopped notifying me so I didn't even know you'd left any til today!

Yes, you're right, I'm definitely lucky to only have them for 6 months (then I have further retainer/invisalign treatment for a while). They are getting worse quite quickly so I know that if I don't do it now then I'm likely to have them for years.

I reckon that people will notice (I show my teeth a lot when I talk and smile) but it's encouraging that most of you comment that people are either encouraging or indifferent. It is not obvious from my smile what is wrong with my bite, so am worried that people won't understand and will think I'm vain for getting it done.

And I'm a teacher (7 year olds) but the kids are the least of my worries! They will be curious but come out with such a lot of random comments anyway that I can take that with a pinch of salt. Nor am I bothered about the pain!

It's just social life that bothers me, especially in London where there are hardly any adults with braces!

Thanks again for your reassurance, B-day is tues so now I have to just prepare myself to grin and bear it (literally!) Am slightly concerned that I am still dreading this so much - did anyone still feel like backing out right until the last minute?

Will let you know how it goes....

Good luck with your extractions Joanna! I had 4 out years ago and it was fine

[osubeanbags]

Yeah, I'd get it done while it will take such short time ... I went to an orthodontist a year or two ago and he said I'd probably only need braces for a year ... now, only a short time later, my time is up to around two years

lol plus, even if you think you'll look "weird" or "stupid" (which you won't), just think how much better your teeth will seem once you get the braces off! Sure, you could keep your teeth how they are and go on as normal ... but they'll look so much better if you go through this short period of time!

Let us know how it goes! Hopefully it's for the best!

[lionfish]

Am slightly concerned that I am still dreading this so much - did anyone still feel like backing out right until the last minute?

Yeah, I did. I was thinking of "rescheduling" my first appointment because I had a full day of talking lined up for the day after and was concerned I'd be unable to get through it. The office staff were obviously used to dealing with such nervous anticipation and said I'd be fine (I was).

It's quite natural to feel like you do right now. After all, until the braces go on you don't really know what to expect, how they will feel, etc.

But like KK says, braces shouldn't stop you doing anything you did before.

In hindsight, I'm glad I stuck with the first appointment. I'm coming up for a year in February and if I'd not followed through, that would be another year gone just thinking about it but doing nothing. This way I'm closer to resolving life long dental issues than I've ever been before.

Like the YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE COME HERE YOU SHOULD GO TO THE COTTAGE DOROTHY! OH SUGAR BARBARA STANWYCK ad, just do it.