just 4 more days till the new me....

Message

#1 Post by **braceasourus** » Fri Feb 27, 2009 9:44 am

Iâ€™m writing this hoping someone knows where I am coming from. Or maybe just to vent I donâ€™t know.

I have a very very bad smile. I had braces when I was little but the orthodontist obviously had no clue what he was doing and my teeth very quickly became a mess after I was done with him. I was about 9 then. I am 24 now and I can safely say I waited a good 13 years to finally get this problem solved. I have tried to get braces before but it never worked out. One doctor even told me that my case was too bad and I just couldnâ€™t be helped. That was devastating. Somehow I just happened to come across my new orthodontist, he is so great. And now I am only 4 days away from finally getting my braces on. Its so many differently feelings for me.

For one I am excited. More excited then I think anyone has ever been to get braces on. I have been counting the days, the minutes even until Tuesday morning. Its really all I think about. This is finally happening. I almost canâ€™t comprehend it.

The thing is, and Iâ€™m sure their are some of you out there who know where I am coming from here, when you have bad teeth people treat you different. I truly believe that when I meet new people they donâ€™t look at me like their equal they donâ€™t look at me like a human. I am just some girl with awful teeth and thatâ€™s all they see. They donâ€™t see that im smart, or pretty or how good at my job I am. I am just that girl with the bad teeth and its all that matters to them. The day I went to my orthodontist for the first time I sat in the waiting room and just cried hysterically. No one really understood why I was crying. They all kept asking if I was scared it would hurt, they were all really really nice but just didnâ€™t get it. When I finally got to speak to the doctor I completely broke down. I begged him to please help me, I canâ€™t live another day like this. Now maybe you guys thing I am mellow dramatic but you have to understand I have lived with this pain inside for so long, people are cruel. Their was a part of me that truly never believed I would ever have straight teeth. I recently looked in the mirror and tried to see what I would look like when I could have a pretty smile. Well when I tried... I didnâ€™t know how to smile. It felt weird for me to move my cheeks that way it was so awkward. I have spend years training my face to never go that way. Smile slightly with lips closed, always.

But now its going to happen. I have sucked up the $8,000 fee and I am doing it. I have had my expander for a little over a month and now March 3rd I get my braces. I am scared that at first its going to look awful. But more then anything I am scared that maybe it wont work for me. I know its silly because people get braces every day and it always works. But it just seems so unreal to me. What if that one doctor was right, what if I cant be helped..

I donâ€™t know what I was really trying to achieve here but I just felt like I needed to listen and you guys are really the only ones who could understand were I am coming from. Thanks for listening... =)

#2 Post by **junkee** » Fri Feb 27, 2009 2:05 pm

oh my god.... i could have almost written this myself. Even at 27 years old, i feel that the real me is yet to be seen. I'm always self conscious about my smile and my social life has really suffered for it. I hate having to meet new people cuz i know they will only think... "what's going on with her teeth" Now that i'm starting my journey, i'm afraid i'll get comments like "it's about time". My teeth don't look like regular crooked teeth. I have one canine that sticks out soo far it almost overlaps my lip when i smile. Also, it looks like the whole right side of my top teeth is collapsing inward. When i was a kid, I was terrified of getting braces. I have no idea why. When i was 13 or 14 i had the molds taken. The day before i was to get braces i cried and begged my mom to cancel the appointment and she did and the issue was never visited again. That is my biggest regret ever! I know my life would have been totally different and i know my personality would be totally different as well if i had taken care of this long time ago.
Fast forward to last year... i went to a dentist for the first time since those molds were taken. When i sat in the dentists chair i just started balling my eyes out. I had uncontrollable tears that i could not stop. I wasn't scared of any physical pain but the emotional pain that i have suffered because of my teeth was pouring out of me.
Anyway, i finally have an expander in my mouth and i'm really doubtful its gonna work. I know my ortho has used it sucessfully on adults and also there are a lot of people on this board doing non-surgical expansion but i just can't actually believe that one day i'll have straight teeth.

So now you know... you are totally not alone on feeling like that!

#3 Post by **braceasourus** » Fri Feb 27, 2009 2:41 pm

Hey, Thank you for responding. I am sorry you feel this way too, but we are on the right road so thats good. Your teeth sound very much like mine. And you hit the nail on the head when you said you were scared about peoples comments once they go on. I am so scared of that too. I just really don't wanna talk about it once they are on...but i know people will make comments and i am sure some jerk will say something to make my cry.

How long have you had the expander in? I had mine in for a little over 2 weeks when i started seeing the gap in my two front teeth. The gap got really big. I was not pleased with it...but at the same i was so happy that it was there because that ment that it was working. They glued the hole on my expander shut less then two weeks ago and now the space is almost closed. So if its any comfort if the expander worked for me then im sure it will work for you.

Please stay in touch and let me know how everything goes for you. Its so nice to have a support system here

#4 Post by **blindboarder2008** » Fri Feb 27, 2009 2:48 pm

First off let me say congratz on getting a braces day!!! I'm happy you were able to find an orthodontist that can help you out and treat your case!

I am happy that you decided to get braces!!!! Hopefully it will all work out for you and you'll get a smile that you are satisfied with!!! From being on this forum for a while (since last may) i've read over alot posts of people being very self conscious of their images and their smiles so your not alone!! I also believe that since we all have braces we can symphasize and emphasize with everyone else here and we have a better understanding because we may or may not go through the same things. One thing is for sure though, were all getting some form of orthodontics.

Glad you joined this board and once again congratz on getting braces

Coming from experience, i have a weird smile myself. Some people have said that when i smile because of the way my jaws align it appears that i strain my jaws and the smile almost looks fake. This kinda annoys me but i know that its going to be fixed once i get my jaw surgery! I'll have better aligned jaws!!! Maybe then i'll be able to smile more properly, heres hoping

#5 Post by **junkee** » Sun Mar 01, 2009 4:59 pm

Braceasorous, Although i too am scared of other peoples comments, you just gotta step back and let rationality take over. It really isn't a big deal to anyone but you. A friend of mine brought me to my senses when i was talking to her about how overwhelmed i was with the expander. If anyone does make a rude comment just know that they are the ignorant jerks and you're better than they are. But most likely, no one will give your braces a second thought. I can't believe those words are coming out of my mouth... i should take my own advice.

To answer your question. i've only had my expander in for 6 days. I had pre-scheduled time off work so tomorrow will be my first day back in the office. I'm super nervous about talking at work... one of the words i can't pronounce is the company name.
Can i ask you, did you explain your speech to your co-workers or did you just ignore it? On one hand, its really none of their business and i don't want unwanted attention on my teeth, but on the other hand, if i let them know maybe it will take a weight off my shoulders.

Don't forget to keep me posted on how your braceday goes!

#6 Post by **braceasourus** » Sun Mar 01, 2009 9:46 pm

Junkee, I told my bosses about the expander. I felt it was important to let them know for a few reasons, one i sounded kinda funny at first and i knew they would wonder what was up. The other thing was i was unsure of how much pain i would be in and i needed them to understand if i needed to go home because of the pain (i wound up never having to do so) The other reason was i asked to make sure i didn't have to be on any conference calls for at least a week. I was so scared of the phone at first.

I didn't tell the people i work with other then one girl whom i am really close with and we just tell each other everything anyways. The guys i work with definitely knew their was something up. Their was one day the first week were i asked a question, not even thinking of my speech and i said the word "me" and i just couldn't say it and i had to repeat myself like 3 times to get the word out. it was this odd moment were everyone wondered what just happened but no one brought it up.

I didn't tell the whole office about it because i just dont like my teeth being the subject of conversation. I think its best to tell your bosses, and maybe one person who you are close with for support but other then that its really no ones business.

I hope things are getting easier for you with the expander, good luck at work tomorrow! I will let you know how Tuesday goes!!

#7 Post by **braceasourus** » Fri Mar 06, 2009 10:52 am

Hey Everyone,

So today is my 4th day with braces. The past few days have been very painful but the pain is starting to subside. I still am not used to them being there and i am pretty aware of them at all times. I am pretty sure i will get used to them eventually though. I have not eaten anything solid yet. i attempted to eat a small bite of bread the other day and whoa that was painful. I am ok with the mushy food diet though. I have been making all types of homemade soups this week and i am sure i will loose weight from eating like this which is awesome!

When i first saw myself i was not pleased at all. I thought it looked awful! But i have to say i kinda like the way it looks now. i feel like the way the braces are lined up the make my teeth look a little nicer... maybe its all in my head but whatever. The weirdest part for me is not being able to shut my mouth all the way without looking silly. i am so used to making sure my lips are glued shut at all times. not being able to do that feels like im walking around naked. i just keep telling myself people will see that the braces are there and i am trying to fix this problem and if they wanna judge me then poo for them!

In the end i am really glad i made the choice to do this!! I cant wait to have a pretty smile!

#8 Post by **Candy** » Fri Mar 06, 2009 12:43 pm

oh goodness Brace, it's funny isn't it? all those years you think you are so alone, and then BAM, everyone on here knows what you're talking about!!!! I always kept my feelings to myself about my teeth, I felt like if I talked about it, people would look even more. I probably thought way worse of myself than what I actually looked. My whole 4 years in high school, I was soo quiet, and was so envious of those girls who smiled big and didn't think twice about talking to someone. I resent all the time I wasted, but I am fixing it now. My teeth problems consist of 2 canines that were up too high and I have an overbite, not terrible, and not enough to tell when my mouth is closed but it was obvious to me. My upper arch was too small, and that's why is got crowded. My lower teeth are great, straight as can be,...I always wished so much that it was the other way around. I could deal with bottom wonkies, just not the top!! My canines are way too sharp, and I'm sure this comes from my bite being off? They are always up too high to be used a lot, and so I wonder if this is why they were not more blunted. I know some people keep their canines pointy but I plan on having the ortho file them a bit at the end.
During childbirth, I remember thinking...ow ow ow ow, gosh does anyone have a camera out because I do not want my teeth showing...ow ow ow....how SAD is that...then when when they were born, I just wanted the world to know how happy I was, and didn't smile big for the camera.
Like you, I don't know how to smile, I know how to do the usual, but the big smile, feels foreign to me.....I am having to practice now as I have to show my teeth when I smile. No choice anymore!!! Now things are straightening up, I feel better about smiling. I don't have many pics on here, because I am mostly on Bracesreview.com (Candymomof3) and my pics are on there (blog) if anyone is interested. I saw major changes the first 3 months!!! Good luck Braces, and everyone....this is such an adventure!

#9 Post by **Bekah** » Fri Mar 06, 2009 1:10 pm

Braceasorous, Congrats on getting them on! Welcome to the club! I like my smile better with the braces than without too! I hav only had a few people even mention my braces and that is usually someone else who has them! Don't worry if you need to vent, we are here for you!

#10 Post by **braceasourus** » Fri Mar 06, 2009 3:28 pm

Candy, reading your post made me get all teary. my goodness i could have written that myself. Its true you go your whole life thinking no one in the world could ever understand the pain you felt from your teeth all your life and now we all have each others support and that is so amazing.

It's funny because like you i would NEVER talk about teeth. like if anything about teeth came up in conversation i would slowly walk away from the group. I never wanted to bring attention to my teeth. Now that the braces are on i don'd mind it so much but i still wonder what people are thinking.

your story about having your babies so could have been me...although i have never had kids but i see where you are coming from there lol. My boyfriend and I have been thinking about getting engaged soonish (i don't know when i want to be surprised) but the most heard breaking thing to me was that i knew if i didn't get this taken care of then i wouldn't be able to smile when he proposed or at my wedding and that is so heartbreaking to me because i love him so much and i want to be able to express that.

Thank you guys so so much for sharing your stories it really is so amazing to have such great support from everyone!!

Fri Mar 06, 2009 7:30 pm

oh man brace: when you were talking about the bread it brought back memories when i first got my braces on. It wasnt to due with bread though but ya lol. I had got my braces on and then came home and i saw watermelon and strawberries on the table so i was like i'm gonna have some lol (figuring it would be okay cause it was nice and soft and not to hard to chew, or so i thought). I tried to bite into it and i just couldnt, was in so much pain it sucked. but ya that my story lol lol
but ya bread is a tough one. It gets so muschy and has a habit of getting stuck in the bracets and then you gota clean it out! pasta and rice are another fun one! Pasta is a good dish to have, i had a lot of that when i first got my braces on. Don't have salad the first few weeks that really painful! lol lol!!! best of luck and keep us posted!

WElcome to the Club!!!!