Thanks for your great replies, I can see this is a quandary for others in this position. Also thanks for not pointing out my misspelling of asymmetrical--rough day yesterday...
scott: my situation sounds almost identical except I haven't had anything done to these teeth previously. one was broken off at an angle and the other one just has a weird shape. I assume the other tooth matched before it was broken, I was very young so I don't remember. drat those "monkey bars" in first grade...
beckyboo: my misaligned and crowded teeth sort of "hid" this as well, now that the teeth are turned it is more obvious. I'm with you and don't want anything ground down, afraid it would make my teeth look even older. veneers are also permanent though since they grind the surface of the teeth to attach them and I have seen some really fake looking ones, so I'm afraid to go that route--also expensive, but just the idea of it bugs me for strictly cosmetic reasons, but I'm trying to keep an open mind because I have to make a good decision about this problem.
pearlies: composite sounds interesting, it wasn't mentioned in my case so I'm not sure why