still suffering from depression/regret after jaw surgery - advice?

[FlyByNight]

Your jaw may have changed, but it wasn't for the looks. It was to achieve a normal bite. There's no reason to feel ashamed.

[spookygee]

If you couldn't breath through your nose, had poor breathing during sleep (sleep apnea which kills you!!!) and high blood pressure, and now all these things are gone after surgery, that's called a success.

thanks friend! i might have not been aware of how different my breathing was before because that was all i was used to. recently i watched two videos almost a year apart from eachother before the surgery when i was at a competitive fighting game tournament and noticed i kept rubbing my nose a lot and was mouth breathing. i dont even remember doing that then but i haven't had the urge to since

i see lots of people having double jaw surgery for sleep apnea and mine was upper jaw only. i was never formally diagnosed with sleep apnea but definitely had upper airway resistance syndrome from my nose. would jump around in my sleep and snore and wake up all the time before the surgery. my lower jaw is 'slightly' recessed now but i like to think that most of the issue with my breathing and sleep was from my nose and jaw/tongue positions. double jaw may have provided more benefit for breathing but its still more risk since it's another surgery. like when they move them forward it opens your airways more -
sometimes i think 'did i even have the right surgery' but think it was more or less a slight compromise for risk/relief that was successful in its own way

sleep has definitely improved, it's not like a night and day improvement but i don't look tired all the time anymore or feel like i need to nap during the day

[spookygee]

I'm not a medical doctor but everything looks much better post op. Especially if u feel all the positive effects, I don't see anything negative. I truly wish u the very best and please let us know how ur feeling. Depression is a hard one, as sometimes it takes over full force without any thought of logic. I too, am a bit depressed from getting braces and it's only for four months duration . Our brains have a crazy way of dictating reality. Good luck to you and I'm sure we will all be better for it in the end

thanks so much. it was WAY more of an emotional experience for me than i ever thought it would be. when going through the process i was so focused on fixing my bite and having relief from other things that i didn't ever really think that how i'd feel about the change in appearance and self image, guilt, and emotions towards looking back on the reality of what they actually do during the surgery and what was done to my body, etc

like i feel WAY better than i did let's say around last thanksgiving, when i admitted myself into a psych hospital for 4 days because this had made me literally unstable. i don't think i'll ever hit 'that' point again. everyday lately has been a bit more positive - i don't feel 100% at peace by any means, but it's enough for me to feel like i'm not as stuck anymore xD

[Juliebrynn1]

I honestly think u look better. I do understand the emotional upheaval though. Like I said, I've had braces for 8 days, and my personality has completely changed. I was way more bubbly and happy. But time, I do know time changes everything. We tend to b more negative on ourselves than anyone else is. With time, we will get through this. Our mind is just making it a mission to control us, lol. I know we'll be completely happy in the long run. Please just try to b patient and know that this will pass.