Fast Aproaching Point of No Return

Message

#1 Post by **gunter8888** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 8:56 am

Gee, I made that sound dire, didn't I?

About 5 hours from now I am due to sit down in the orthodontist's chair and have the impressions done for my palate expander (removeable) and to make the down payment for all my ortho work.

I just keep thinking, "Once you drop all that cash there is NO GOING BACK!" I have wanted this for years and now I am having cold feet?

I am a 34-year-old, married, father of 3 who works in software sales. I worry about what effect braces may have on my career (I have to talk and present A LOT). I worry about pain and I worry about what effect all that hardware might have on my love life and relationship with my wife.

There seems to be quite a few adult women on this board, but not many men. I'd love to hear from guys who work in the professional world and have braces. Has it affected your job or your work relationships?

Am I just being a woosie? Anyway, thanks for giving me a place to vent this and thank you in advance for your feedback.

#2 Post by **36nBraced** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 10:15 am

i'm a married, father of one and a senior financial analyst for a fortune 25 firm. i had the same concerns too but i quickly got over them. my motto is once you commit to something, never second guess it. i'm in meetings and i present too, not with the frequency of sales, but i haven't had any problems. and you won't either. the braces can affect your speech, i've noticed that i have a slight lisp on certain words, but that's about it. if you have good diction, you'll be fine. truthfully, i'm not even sure my co-workers even care if i have braces because no one has made a comment about them. my manager knows because i had to let her know the reason i had 8 million dentists appointments.

in short, no worries. simply knowing that i'm on my way to that million dollar smile has made me more confident. i smile more now and talk more whereas in the past, i was hesitant because i didn't want people to notice my teeth. i truly didn't realize that my unhappiness with my smile had that much of an effect on me

my wife with her perfect teeth, calls me her teenage brace face now

she thinks it's cute. part of the reason i got braces was to tighten up the professional appearance and for my 9 month old daughter, so she can see mommy and daddy with straight teeth. when she's in braces, i can show her the before and after, letting her know how this will enhance her life for the better. i believe that you'll have more confidence if you're happier with your "package". flaws in your appearance can lead to low self-esteem.

#3 Post by **Pirate Wench** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 11:21 am

I know you asked to talk to the guys in the group, but I couldn't let this pass.
I just have to comment on your love life with your wife. I am pretty sure she didn't marry you for your teeth. I was worried about my husband not finding me attractive with braces. He has admitted to me that he can't wait for them to be off (in about 2 years), but he said they don't make any difference to him at all. Take it easy kissing when you first get them.....I wasn't used to the hardware in my mouth and cut the inside of my lip. Other than that.....all is great.

That is just my 2 cents....

#4 Post by **JoeMama** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 11:30 am

I'm not a guy either. I'm a 30-something female who has to go out and meet with a lot of people for work. I had similar feelings about getting mine on, but they've not affected my work at all. In fact I feel the same way 36cbraces feels:

I smile more now and talk more whereas in the past, i was hesitant because i didn't want people to notice my teeth.

It's true!

The braces take some getting used to. The thing to remember is that they're a bigger deal to you than they are to anyone else. In fact most people could care less or wish they had the courage to do the same. And once they're off you're going to have a great smile!

#5 Post by **gunter8888** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 12:54 pm

Thank you all for your responses. I didn't mean to suggest that I did not want input from the ladies. In fact I really appreciated this little tidbit - The thing to remember is that they're a bigger deal to you than they are to anyone else.

While I am still plenty anxious, I am actually getting kind of excited to begin this process.

Thanks everyone!

#6 Post by **rsprouse** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 12:59 pm

You can always go back....it's just money which comes and goes.

I am 28 and have had braces for almost 6 months now. My wife also thinks its cute, but she is incredibly supportive because she knew I wanted to do it. I was hoping it would cause me to get carded more frequently but that hasn't happened. I joke that it makes me look 12, and it kinda does. The only reason you should go through it (as it will suck at times) is because you want it. If your heart is not in it then don't bother. But in the end you will hopefully have the outcome that you wanted. And I know in my case it will be worth it.

You are going to have an adjustment period with all the new hardware, especially the expander. Some people make it with a small lisp and others have nothing noticeable. But be aware that there is a good chance you will be drooling on yourself and lisping for a bit. But like anything, you will adjust and they will become of part of you in no time. You will be surprised how little colleagues and people care about the fact that you are braced. Seems like a big deal, but it is not. I got over the self consciousness thing real quickly.

Regarding your relationship the only thing that I have noticed is some rubbing and irritation on the mucosa of your lips. I'm not really interested in your habits

but I am comfortable in telling you that you will be able to do everything that you do now.

I used to work in Professional Services for a software company so I know where your concerns stem from. But don't worry, most people will be very accepting. I got braces because I knew that if I were going to stand up in front of patients and recommend anything cosmetic, I better have "a perfect smile". It hasn't effected my job at all, but that is no surprise based on my current career. Good luck and keep the shiny side up, things will work out just fine.

Best,
Rory

#7 Post by **JaneBy** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 1:11 pm

Since you opened this up to all...

I work for an advertising agency...so I present a lot and met with a lot of different people - basically every day...plus I talk on the phone tons.

I chose full metal braces so when I open my mouth there's no guessing..."is she lisping or wearing braces?".

My boss is the only one who has ever made a negative comment (and he's pretty much an ID-iot)...I've actually had a prospective client ask me after a meeting about my braces (he had a front gap)...oh a few co-worker friends will ask me to pronounce some select "f" and "s" words...so thingssssss may ssssound ffunny.

I've also been married over 20 years...braces haven't changed a thing!

No cold feet!

#8 Post by **Jared** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 2:08 pm

I am a manager in state govt. and do a lot of public speaking and presentations. I am also married and have five kids. I have been braced for almost two months. It took me a couple weeks to get comfortable with them. But I can honestly say it hasn't been that big a deal. Sometimes you just have to make yourself the brunt of a joke when you have a hard time pronouncing a word. Also, I have found that if you speak a little more slowly you can enunciate a little better. I also try to have fun with my braces--started out with red, white, and blue ligatures. Now I am in all blue. Next adjustment will go to black and orange for Halloween. People see that as a sign of confidence, not weakness. I think that if someone saw that I had lost a little weight from working out that they would see that as a positive. I can't see how getting braces is any different. Best of luck!

#9 Post by **lionfish** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 3:55 pm

20c (australian) worth from another woman....

Everything you're going through as you prepare for this little adventure is what most of us go through.

I was terrified of how braces would impact on my professional, personal and recreational life (I'm married, no kids, very active outdoorsy type, love my food) and what "people would think." It only took me 35 years to take the plunge, so you can see how heavily this had been weighing on me.

I was self conscious about visual impact so I chose a low visibility option (upper linguals/lower ceramics) and parted with a fairly hefty fee up front.

I worried for nothing. Virtually no-one notices a difference (or if they do, the topic is raised once and never again). There have been no lifestyle impacts. My husband is solicitous, but I am careful not to bore him with too many details or complaints.

It's really a state of mind and I recall the words of my ortho at the outset of treatment: look upon this as a positive experience.

Best of luck and I'm sure you'll not regret your decision. We're all in this together.

#10 Post by **gunter8888** » Fri Aug 04, 2006 7:08 am

Its done! It was really interesting. I left work and made the 15 minute drive to the ortho's office and the entire time I worried about all kind of stuff. When I arrived I parked the car and sat there worrying some more. Finally I went into the office. The minute I sat down in the chair I had the coolest, calm feeling. I relaxed, felt like myself and began joking with the assistants as they took pictures and impressions. When it was done and I had to make the down payment I was actually eager to get out my card and pay.

I go back next Wednesday to recieve my expander. I have read some horrror stories on here about expanders, but I take some solace in the fact that mine is removeable which will be handy for brushing and cleaning it. I also find myself wanting to complete the expander phase as quickly as possible so I can get my brackets and be a true "metal mouth".

Thanks everyone. Your insights were extremely helpful and I am so excited to become a full-fledged member of the Metal Mouth Club.