My ortho is interested in dating me??!!!

[Jesslzz]

Ok, here is how this story goes: My ortho has an assistant who happens to be his mother and a dentist as well. This was kind of a good thing when I decided to go with the treatment almost a year ago. Over the months I found out that this woman is a good and friendly person who loves to chat about almost anything. She even speaks to me when I'm on the chair with my mouth wide open!!:D
Anyway, on this past November appointment I was chatting with her as usual while I was on my way out. Replying on a comment she made I kind of mentioned that I was single again (at the beginning of treatment my now ex boyfriend was with me - so she assumed I was still in a relationship)

On my past appointment (December) I made a Merry Christmas card and I gave it to them. This woman was very happy and during the whole adjustment she was asking all kind of questions to me. I thought that was a bit strange, but I totally forgot about that. Next day, I received a phone call from her. I thought that maybe they should change my appointment date or something like that but she was talking differently. She started talking to me about how much his son (my ortho) was interested in me but because of professional ethics he couldn't say a thing. I certainly didn't expect that and I was just frozen there by the phone.

She continued talking to me about how much she liked me too and that was the reason why she called...She was very honest and sweet, but I couldn't say anything...I was mute! Anyway, she kind of implied that this was a secret, that he didn't know anything about this conversation. She also gave me his personal email address if I was interested in writing to him. I actually say to her that I was caught off guard, that I never considered that: "well, you never know, maybe if we meet out of the office someday...I don't know...well..." Geez, I know, I started saying nonsense, but I was still in shock. Anyway, she thought that I should write to him to say "Happy New Year" or something...Of course I didn't do that, I was just too confused about everything.

When this conversation ended I couldn't believe what had just happened. I'm sure he doesn't know anything about what his mother is doing because he is very professional, and I have to say that I'm too. Ethics are very important to me so I don't think I can do anything about this situation.
As I see it, if I ever get to date him, it would be very awkward to continue my orthodontic treatment with him, not to mention if things don't go right . I wouldn't like to change my ortho in the middle of the treatment. I decided to find a way to talk to his mother in private and explain her the situation, and the reason why I never wrote him an "Happy New Year" email.

The problem is that in different circumstances maybe I would date him. He is a year older than me and we honestly have many things in common, but I'm not sure about this, I can't tell anything by the short amount of time we speak each time!!!

Anybody had a similar experience? If I was about to end my treatment I should consider dating him...(I definitely wouldn't have to worry about my braces ) but I have 8 more months to go yet. I think I'm doing the right thing but... who knows?
I'm really interested in your opinions...I know some of you may think that his mother was very intrusive and her attitude was unethical to call me that way, but I think she was just trying to help in a very weird way.

What a surprise, don't you think??? He was the last person I thought it would be interested in me!!!

[victory1]

The surgeon that removed my wisdom teeth asked me out on the phone 2 days later in the guise of checking to see how i was feeling. I thought it was strange that he was making a personal call himself since it's a huge office. Anyway I said no because I did not find him attractive. If I did, I would have said yes. Professional men that are established are hard to come by. Do you find your ortho attractive? If yes, let his mother know if you are single at the end of your treatment and he is still available, you might consider going out with him to 1 date.

[overseasmel]

If you are interested, and he is, then it may be a nice thing in the future, but I'd probably wait until very close to braces removal date before letting anything start. Not to be too gloomy but imagine if the relationship did go sour and it affected your treatment in some way. I'm sure you're like most of us on this board, for whom orthodontic treatment with a view to getting great teeth and a great smile has been something we have been dreaming about and planning for for quite some time. 8 months isn't too long in the grand scheme of things and if you are really keen then it'll add to the excitement of getting braces off too! Two good things to mark on your calendar!

Good luck though with whatever you decide.

[PrincessMelody]

I would take this opportunity while you are still in treatment to get to know him more personally, as a friend so to speak. It could turn out that there is something about him that would cause you guys to clash in a relationship so you wouldn't want to pursue one with him anyways. I would definately explain your feelings to his mother. And if you are interested in him let her know that once you are done with treatment and if both of you are still single that you would go out on a date with him and see where things go from there. But like I said, view the remaining time in your treatment as the initial time people spend getting to know each other. There's certainly nothing wrong with finding out more about your ortho and you can approach it from a professional standpoint. If anything, you could become friends after you have finished treatment since you said you have things in common.

[sjsarre]

I'm a very professional person, but sometimes in the right circumstances, its not an issue.

From the tone of your typing there is some interest in him because you would have said an outright no without any consideration and typing on the forum to ask people what you think is like a subconscious asking how other people might view this type of relationship and how they might feel.

Living on a smallish island some of my friends have entered into relationships with people that they met in professional circumstances. In fact its quite common place. Its nothing to be ashamed about.

I would take the bull by the horns and email him with a belated happy new year. Play it by ear. He may be feeling the same way about you (which is what appears to be happening)

It might take a few months to progress to any further stage or not at all. It might also be nice to go out for a drink or a meal. I've met countless people in a professional environment which I feel close to and I know on occasion one or two have felt more. But we have been out for a drink (no other terms) and ended up with a brilliant friendship at the end of it and nothing more.

[starryadora]

I say go for it! My ortho offered me a job as his orthodontic asst and that was one of the things we talked about....If for some reason I started working there and later on decided it wasn't really my thing that he said no worries about my treatment...there would be no hard feelings there. I have bene working there for just about 2 months no and it all worked out great! It sounds like your ortho is very professional so hey, if you are interested in him I say go for it! Let us know how it goes;) lol

[Delag]

Kudos to any guy who works with his Mom! Shows he is a real family guy.....as long as he doesn't ilve with her too . I think finding any kind of connection in todays world is a difficult and if an opportunity presents itself you should take advantage. You only have a few months of treatment left, so if things didn't work out you wouldn't be stuck seeing him for too long. Like the other poster said, you can start small - coffee, walks etc.... if things click you can get more serious as you end treatment. Do keep us updated - I think we have a board full of hopeless romantics!

[Jesslzz]

Thanks for your answers! I think that your comments are really great, and help me see things in a different perspective. I think you are right, PrincessMelody, this remaining treatment time can be an opportunity to getting to know more about him.

The fact is that I'm not really sure if I like him or not. Honestly, I never quite saw him in that way, for me he was my orthodontist only. That is why I'm not sure about this, I guess that during my next appointments I will be paying more attention, he he. I find this whole situation very surprising, that is the reason why I needed to share it

I have been single for a year now but I'm not in a hurry, I will wait until the end of treatment and if we are still single, as you said, maybe we can give it a go. Anyway, I'm thrilled with my progress and I don't want to interfere with my own treatment.

I never thought that braces would bring me so many surprises!