New, unhappy, pics

Message

#1 Post by **Dinker** » Thu May 24, 2007 8:32 pm

Hi all,

I have had my braces on for about a month now. I don't have much (if any) pain, just the typical loose teeth issues. My problem is this -

I didn't get braces because my teeth were crooked, they were very straight - see before pic. I had 4 baby teeth in back missing the permanent ones above them. They came out in my twenties, my teeth never moved. Now that I am 45 my back teeth have begun to shift and my front on one side did too, only it was so slight you couldn't tell. Ortho said have to wear braces for a year (what???) and I am hating this. My mouth looks like a fish mouth now, my smile lines have turned to wrinkles and my lips are so stretched now. My lips do not go over the braces well, I have to use wax in the top front (not on the two front teeth) and lube it with a chapstick type thing I got at Trader Joe's which is very helpful. It's kinda greasy so it helps you to slide better but it still looks like I have a very ugly stern look.

My braces are huge, the picture below is not true to life, you can barely see them in the pic. Everyone comments about how HUGE they are and "Why so big?" My mother even said now I look like I could eat corn through a picket fence. I am going in July to meet my boyfriends family and am totally dreading this trip. I feel gross. I look gross. I don't know why mine show up so much and others dont. I have the clear brackets and clear ligs. I just dont get it. It's hard to go from having seemingly perfect teeth to this.

Before- pics are kinda distorted, looks weird.

After

#2 Post by **GinaLime** » Thu May 24, 2007 10:34 pm

I just wanted to pitch in that you DON'T look gross. Your teeth are very nice, white and even-looking. You may have trouble closing your mouth now, but your teeth will glide over your new smile easily in just 11 months!

I'm sorry folks haven't been understanding. A lot of times, I think seeing an adult with braces makes them wish they had the resources (emotional and financial) to fix their teeth -- there are a lot of people out there unhappy with their smile.

11 months from now, you'll be SO happy you did this. Good luck!

#3 Post by **Lisa65** » Fri May 25, 2007 12:10 am

I don't think you look gross either. People can be very unsupportive at times. Perhaps because your teeth are big and your smile therefore looks big too has made people notice your braces more. The ceramic brackets are in general larger than the metals, so the combination of having a wide smile and slightly larger ceramic brackets has led to these unhelpful comments from your family.

If your front teeth have flared slightly in the early stages of treatment then this might explain the difficulty in closing your lips. I have the same problem at the moment, but my teeth were so crooked before that it's an improvement for me

Negative comments are hurtful especially when they come from people you love and who you would hope would support you at a time when you needed it. 11 months will pass quickly but in the meantime I echo the advice given below. the more self-conscious you are about your braces, the more it will be picked up on by others. I have full metal and I grin at everyone I meet because I'm proud to be doing something constructive for ME, and I've never had any nasty comments.

Good luck with meeting your boyfriend's family. Hopefully by then you'll be more used to your braces and they won't see it as a big deal either.

#4 Post by **DirtyMartini** » Fri May 25, 2007 1:34 am

I'm in the lead up to getting braces on and I can only say...I hope I look as 'gross' as you do when I get braces.

Seriously...those braces don't look bad and you've only got 11 more months to go (I'll be braced for 2 years plus possible surgery). 11 months is NOTHING in the scheme of things...11 months flies by.

If you are genuinely worried about meeting your boyfriend's family then perhaps ask him to give them a heads up that you have braces and are self-conscious about them.

Good luck, I hope you keep the braces and I hope you find a way to accept your current braced look.

#5 Post by **Miss Smiley** » Fri May 25, 2007 2:23 am

Your pic that shows you braced doesn't look horrible. It just looks like you have a retainer wire going across. You should go look at my crazy, extraction gaps and then tell me your smile is horrific!!!!!! My mouth looks like a picket fence because of all the shifting.

If you can't get your lips to cover your teeth. just smile more. That's what I did with my Mr. Ed's smile!

#6 Post by **insanemommy03** » Fri May 25, 2007 4:52 am

I don't think they look bad at all!!

You should be proud of them!!!

It will be over soon!! Just keep that chin up!

#7 Post by **Dinker** » Fri May 25, 2007 9:53 am

Thank you for the compliments, but I think I probably didn't explain myself very well. What are huge are the braces, not my teeth. They may look that way in the pics because I took them with my cell phone and it looks distorted. The braces are HUGE! Plus, like I said in the first post, the "after braced" pic is not true to life, I only wish they looked like that. They are very big, they stick out away from my teeth so far that that is the reason why my upper lip hangs up and I have to make these dreadful faces to cover my teeth again.

My bite is fine, the ortho said it's "near perfect" so that has no bearing on it. I think what is hard for me is that unlike so many of you who have a wonderful gift at the end of this ordeal, I wont, I will have my same teeth and same smile. Not that that is a bad thing mind you, but it makes going through all this for nothing.

I was at a highschool graduation a few nights ago and noticed many teens in their braces, not one had huge honkin things like I have! They all had the same kind as I do, just not the same size. It looked like what they had on their uppers were the size of my lowers. I will be asking next visit why...

Probably my biggest concern is how in one month of my mouth area being so out of normal shape that I have gained what appears to be permanent wrinkles and have aged probably 10 years. EEEE GADS what will a year do?????

Thanks for being supportive, I am feeling so down about all this.

#8 Post by **kirjax** » Fri May 25, 2007 2:13 pm

I too feel that my brackets are huge!! But it's been two weeks and they don't seem as big as I thought they were on the first couple of days. They do howver look larger then metal bc everyone I see with metal I'm like wow they look tiny. I though getting ceramic would make them appear like they're not there but it's so not true. I notice them and it does take time to get used to them. I however have really tiny teeth and a small mouth so everything bulks out on me! I can't wait to compare them to the bottom metals bc at this point I'm wishing I got all metal!

#9 Post by **kypsis** » Fri May 25, 2007 2:19 pm

Dinker, I make "faces" too when I am trying to close my mouth after smiling or speaking, cause the braces stick out and my lips don't slide very well on them. I've only had them for 2 weeks, though, so maybe it gets better with time? Plus, I'm sure the "faces" you make aren't as horrific as you think - what feels like a huge oddity to me when closing my mouth, no one has really commented.

Just stay positive - if your ortho said you need braces, then it's for a solid reason, and you'll be better off for having had them, even if your smile and bite don't really change much in the end! Plus, one year is not nearly as long as most of the people on this board are "sentenced to", so it'll fly by in no time

#10 Post by **beachrose** » Fri May 25, 2007 5:11 pm

Hi Dinker - Your teeth are beautiful so I can understand why you're so unhappy right now. However, you said your teeth have started shifting at 45 so can you imagine how they would be at 65 (my age - in lower braces for the first time). My teeth started shifting in my late 20's and just got worse and worse over the years. I eventually had to have the four top front teeth removed because they turned in so badly. I had a bridge for years and then two years ago had a bone transplant and four implants and 3 crowns on each side of those. All that took about a year and a half. If I had had braces at your age, I would not have lost my teeth. I think in the end you will be happy with this decision, but it is hard. I figure at my age, I could have 35 or 40 more years with straight teeth, so look how many years you will have with beautiful, straight, healthy teeth. And believe me, I feel pretty self-conscious, too, because it's a bit hard to talk and I am constantly biting the inside corners of my mouth. But I am determined to bear with this. We started about the same time (April 30 for me) and I also anticipate being through in about 11 months.

I also understand how you feel about this making you look older. Sometimes I think that all my dental work has added to the drooping and loss of elasticity around my mouth. However, stressing over this will make you look older in the end than the dental work. Do all the things we are always told to do to keep young and healthy (water, sleep, diet and exercise) and in one year you will look beautiful and be very happy that you did this.

#11 Post by **insanemommy03** » Fri May 25, 2007 5:23 pm

I think they look very well proportioned on your teeth. You can hardly see them, being ceremic and all!!

#12 Post by **Kat** » Fri May 25, 2007 6:58 pm

Hi Dinker, we are in the same boat. I also have the ceramics on top and when mine were put in place I almost cried right there in the orthos bathroom and ha d almost a instant love hate relationship with them. My brackets looked huge to me as well. I think now it's just not a natural thing to have these things stuck on your teeth. In your pics pretty much we see right past the brackets, but you see them. You have a silver wire. Next appointment ask for the white wire, this makes it so much easier on the eyes-I changed mine.
Problem is it's so new to you.
I too met boyfriends family right after being braced and wished they could have met me and seen what I really looked like. I'll know them when they are off and if they want to be so shallow in judging you with them on, let them. You'll be suprised they won't even think much of them but you will. Time is a factor here. They are so new.
I too know these things make me look at least 10 years older as well doing the same thing to my lips and lip lines. I noticed this shortly after they were placed.
Look at it all as a positive. You are correcting your mouth.
It's a big deal for you and all of us who have these things BUT the rest of the world could care less.

Show them who you are, and that's all they'll see. Don't let the braces get in the way.

(At first I would mention these braces in conversation, I noticed really that anyone I spoke with really could care less...I mean it.)

#13 Post by **mamabracito** » Fri May 25, 2007 7:05 pm

Just wanted to say you don't look bad with those braces at all. As for the discomfort...i had that too...u will get use to it.

#14 Post by **Mmmmuuaa** » Fri May 25, 2007 7:09 pm

Hi Dinker

I have the clear crystal brackets on my top arch, looks like thats what you have, and I remember in the beginning that my lips felt like they didn't fit over them. Now that my lips are used to the braces being there they are nicely relaxed and my top bracets actually sit kinda between my lips. Much more comfortable than in the beginning when I tried to get my upper lip to stay over them. Hang in there. I've always had positive reactions from people, and actually smile more now then I did before. Hope that you get used to them, good luck.

#15 Post by **LadyTr0uble** » Sat May 26, 2007 9:51 pm

Alright, my turn for my two cents: YOU LOOK FINE!!!!!

I know that initial shock is traumatic, but at least you didn't look in the mirror and saw a nice rollercoaster. That will soon pass. Your pix resemble some of the pix of those who are almost done with their braces.

12 months are going to fly by so quickly. I am sentenced to 18-24 months, and i remember thinking "holy moly, I can't get rid of this rollercoaster in my mouth till the end of 2008?!?! Maybe the $5000 to switch to Invisalign partway into my treatment will be worth it." Now I am 6 months (oh crap, it's been half a year already? I am still in shock) into it, and I barely notice them. You're just not used to them yet. And if you feel self-conscious for whatever reason, you are going to be done in no time flat! Water also helps with the lip vs. braces thing.

The best advice people in this forum gave me was "keep on living your life as normally as possible." The less you stress about them, the less people are going to notice them. I am sorry your family isn't as supportive as you'd want them to be. Give them time. I've got a Chinese grandmother who keeps asking me why I bother to pull a perfectly good tooth and putting myself through the pain of having braces when I already had a beautiful smile. Just let comments like that go.

You are going to come across perfect strangers who will notice that you have braces on and they will tell you:
A: I had braces as an adult and it was the best thing that I ever did for myself.
B: My wife/husband/girlfriend/boyfriend/mother/father/ friend/etc got them a while back and ...
C: I have always wanted to get braces but I just couldn't do it.
D: I had braces as a kid but since I didn't wear my retainers, I want to get them again.

It's almost like walking around pregnant or with a kid. Notice how people will walk up to you and share their experieinces? It's the same thing.

Treat braces like something you simply had to do for your own health. I hope you and your loved ones will come to accept your braces.

Good luck with your boyfriend's family! I know meeting the bf's family is a big thing, and to have to deal with braces on top of that is even more stress. My bf's mom showed me pix of my bf's younger brother with braces on and told me all kinds of braces stories. Actually, that's how we bonded. weird, huh?

Well, lots of luck to you. If you are interested in seeing pix taken at close range, I have quite a few at: viewtopic.php?t=16410&highlight=
This can serve as a way for you to look at someone else's terrible teeth and think "lucky me, I don't have to deal with that"

You can't imagine to things I did just so i can get the details of the various ortho paraphernalia in my mouth to turn up on my camera!

Good luck (again!)