self conscious

[artsyalice]

My braces went on last Thursday and things are going pretty well. I'm not wild about eating with the bite plate, but it's doable. I don't keep it in when I'm at work since my lisp is so bad, but in order to not break off my bottom brackets, there are still some sounds that come out funny even with it off.

The thing is, I'm really self conscious about the way I'm talking. I also hate the way I look in braces and am pretty self conscious about that as well. Does this get better over time, or am I just going to spend the next couple of years of my life feeling this way? I'm just really frustrated.

[MissDiana]

First of all, hi and congratulations!

Secondly, yes, I promise, it gets better. I've been braced for a little over two months now and I can tell you that there I times when I forget about them alltogether! You will get used to it, and you will learn how to talk "around them."

It WILL get better, and when you get really frustrated, just think about the wonderful thing you are doing for yourself, and how great you're going to look when it's all over!

[fitchick]

Hi Alice,

Congratulations from me too Alice on getting started. MissDiana and Meryaten are so right. If you ask anyone else, they don't take any notice of our braces at all, hardly anyone has ever mentioned them to me in the last year.

I can understand how you feel about the bite plate, I had reservations when I got mine to start with, but I am so glad that I stuck with it because you honestly do adjust the more you speak with it in. If you don't wear it at work then it will take longer to do its job and you won't get used to it nearly as quick. I do understand because my work involves talking to people all day long. Your question.............

"Does this get better over time, or am I just going to spend the next couple of years of my life feeling this way?............

.
I asked myself the same question 12 months ago, and within weeks it began to get better. Have you tried recording yourself speaking and then listening back to it? My ortho suggested this when I told him I didn't like the way I sounded, and I didn't sound any different when I played it back. It won't get easier if you avoid wearing it though. I am likely to finish with mine soon and I am slightly nervous about how I will sound without it, that's how much I am used to it now. Bite the bullet, don't worry about others, just be concerned about getting your teeth as perfect as you can. You will be glad that you did.

It really is worth it, trust me. Good Luck.

[mindykatz]

Hi artsyalice! I've only had my braces on for a few days but I can offer a small bit of help with your self consciencess problem from what I've experienced so far.

For the first 2 days or so, I felt pretty stupid having what I thought looked like half of the Home Depot in my mouth (I have full metal Damons on my uppers and lowers). But here's a tip for when you talk to other people - look at their eyes! The first few times you talk to someone, you'll notice that their eyes will go back and forth from your eyes to your teeth, because yes, they are looking at your braces. However, the more you talk to that person, you'll notice that their eyes look at your braces less and less, and eventually, they don't look at them at all. This same thing has already happened to pretty much everyone I talk to on a regular basis, and I'm less than a week in! When they stop looking at your braces, it pretty much means they have forgotten that you even have them and you can relax, which is a good thing!

As adults, we don't have to worry about other adults making fun of us for our braces like school aged kids do. If an adult DOES make fun of you (which they wont), then they obviously have some major self esteem issues of their own, and you can shoot them back down very easily. So don't worry about that at all!

Smile big, laugh loudly, and try to be proud of the fact that in a few years, you will have a picture-perfect, movie-star, glistening-white smile! None of us signed up for this braces thing to look gogeous right away - it's the end result we are after. So keep that in mind and you'll do great!

I actually think I look sort of cute in my braces now...like an older, wiser 13 year old...lol!!!

[Pixel Witch]

My DH actually said, "it's kinda sexy...I can't stop looking at your lips!"

Yes. Mine thought it would be cute to ask me to put my hair in pigtails and go buy a plaid skirt and white blouse to hang out at home wearing.

Men. Hmph.

[dojo]

I think you need to relax and not feel ashamed. why should you feel ashamed? Because you had access to some treatment that many don't even think about (in my country at least I am FORTUNATE to be able to wear the braces. They cost so much that very few people can actually do something about their teeth) ... you are in for an awesome result. Think about the superb teeth you'll have and just enjoy the ride

[mindykatz]

that is a REALLY good point dojo - I hadn't thought about that! Braces aren't the most flattering thing in the world (although they're not the least flattering), but we should all be proud that we are fortunate enough to be able to do something about our smiles!

That rocks!

[lionfish]

For the first 2 days or so, I felt pretty stupid having what I thought looked like half of the Home Depot in my mouth

However, the more you talk to that person, you'll notice that their eyes look at your braces less and less, and eventually, they don't look at them at all. This same thing has already happened to pretty much everyone I talk to on a regular basis, and I'm less than a week in! When they stop looking at your braces, it pretty much means they have forgotten that you even have them and you can relax, which is a good thing!

This is so true. I know that in days gone by when I looked at people in braces, I looked at the braces for a while then I returned my gaze to the person's eyes.

[red indian]

Hi I got my braces two and a half weeks ago. It does reaaly get better quite fast.I have found myself taking a little extra care to be dress better so that people complement the good stuff.(Thats a pretty dress/ lipstick etc.) Its a really superficial solution- but it helps me..

[artsyalice]

Thanks so much for your support everyone. I'm feeling a bit better today about the situation. I think it will just take some time to get used to things. Not being a patient person makes this a challenge.

My husband has been very supportive and thinks my braces are cute. Pixelwitch - I told my husband I'd have to get a little cheer leading uniform for his enjoyment.

I think my biggest issue is that I just find braces in general unattractive. I hope this doesn't offend anyone, it's just something I've always felt, so getting used to seeing them on myself is really hard. I'm trying to act as though it doesn't bother me when I'm around others. Hopefully the more I act this way the more I'll feel this way.

Also, my best friend laughed at me when I told her I had to get braces. One of my worst fears was that people would laugh at me (kind of silly I know but what can I say?). So, that being one of the first reactions of someone when I told them was just really hard for me. I guess that goes to show her maturity level.

So, thanks again everyone for your responses. I guess during this initial phase I'll have good days and bad days, and hopefully over time as I get used to things, the bad days will subside.

[Miss Smiley]

Artsy - what's unattractive about someone who takes care of themself? NOTHING!!! Don't be ashamed to have braces and people won't be thinking anything of them.