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I cant commit to getting braced. :(
Posted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 11:49 am
by SunshineRay
Grrr, I typed a long post and it logged me out while posting.
I am 38, married with kids. I think I’m pretty except for my smile. I can still remember someone in high school actually saying that. I overheard her say that I was pretty until I opened my mouth. I’ve carried that around over 20 yrs. I never laugh…..I feel like there’s a whole other person inside of me that no one sees because I hold back. I feel like an idiot when people are laughing and I just kinda smirk. I don’t laugh unless I’m around the kids. My husband thinks I’m miserable most of the time…..I guess my teeth always bothered me but I had youth on my side and now that I’m getting older my looks are too. Geesh sounds like I’m having a mid-life crisis.
We have 2 girls who will be needing braces in the next year or so. I sometimes think how it would be me wasting money since they need them. My dentist said if I got mine on now they would be coming off around the time the oldest needed to get hers on. My husband has no idea that my teeth bother me. I’ve only talked about it on here and with my oldest daughter.
Then I think that I’ve made it 38 yrs with teeth this way and that’s half my life so why bother now. Until I’m around people and feel all awkward.
A friend just asked me to be in her wedding in August and all I could think was I will ruin it. I won’t be smiling walking down the aisle and will ruin the pics. I practice trying to take good pics. If the camera is farther away you can’t see my overbite and my teeth look straight. (overbite and space in between 2 front teeth)
My dentist wants $700 to do the molds/xrays/treatment plan/consult. That money gets put towards the braces if you chose to go with them. I am very comfy with this dentist (he does ortho too) but know that he’s expensive. I had a free consult with another ortho and while I liked what he said (somewhat) I didn’t like him or his office. He was kinda rude asking if I just woke up one morning and didn’t like my teeth….I forget his exact words but I took it as I’m old, why bother. His office is one room with a bunch of chairs so it’s all open. I didn’t ask a lot of questions because it was embarrassing. He quoted me $4800 for bottom braces for 2 yrs and on the top would be a thing that looked like a retainer that is behind my teeth. I said I had never seen one behind the teeth and he said he created it….hmmm? I really liked that idea because my teeth would be moving yet no one would see it…..that thing for a year and then regular braces on top for a yr. I emailed my dentist office and asked if they did something like the retainer thing and I never got an answer after being sent to the ortho assistant. I didn’t bother to ask again since they probably don’t want to give out free advice without doing the consult.
So why cant I commit? I imagine getting braced and coming to work feeling super awkward. I have anxiety anyway so just to think about it makes me anxious. I know it would go away after a few days but just the initial time, ugh. Has anyone else overcome these feelings and went forward with getting braced?
Re: I cant commit to getting braced. :(
Posted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 12:09 pm
by Marigold
Absolutely can relate! I was 45 when I went on some consults, but I put it off because the thought of being braced at my age for 2 1/2 years was so daunting. I finally went through with it over a year later. I'm now 48 and still braced. If only I'd started at 45, I'd be done by now. It sounds like orthodontics will be a huge boost to your self-esteem. I say go for it! The sooner you start, the sooner they'll be off, and you'll have a smile you'll want to flaunt instead of hiding. You won't regret it!
Re: I cant commit to getting braced. :(
Posted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 12:52 pm
by Bikerchick85
I say go for it! The money spent will be nothing compared to the confidence and happiness you will feel when it's all finished! This is my third time in braces and I am fully commited this time! I'm only about 7 weeks into treatment but I already feel more confident about my smile! It's never too late to do something for you! That 'I'm too old' mind set is like saying "We're all going to die so why do anything while we are alive? What's the point?" The point is to make yourself happy while you ARE here in this life!!
Re: I cant commit to getting braced. :(
Posted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 1:16 pm
by SunshineRay
Bikerchick85 wrote:I say go for it! The money spent will be nothing compared to the confidence and happiness you will feel when it's all finished! This is my third time in braces and I am fully commited this time! I'm only about 7 weeks into treatment but I already feel more confident about my smile! It's never too late to do something for you! That 'I'm too old' mind set is like saying "We're all going to die so why do anything while we are alive? What's the point?" The point is to make yourself happy while you ARE here in this life!!
Very true about being happy now!
Thanks for the replies.
Re: I cant commit to getting braced. :(
Posted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 5:38 pm
by Angel269
Hi SunshineRay
I can 100% relate to you. I had a midline diastema too and always looked so miserable-could never open my mouth, or talk in public to people in fear they were staring at my teeth and smiling-forget it!
My son (18 months) has also inherited my teeth so I think that the motivation to address my teeth was because I knew he would need to address his a teen and I kind of had a brace fear myself (mainly due to the metal appearance and fear of pain, which then provoked a general dental fear).
I had upper ceramic braces (wanted to be as discreet as I could with it, especially as I have a tooth coloured archwire too) put on late June 2012 to close my diastema, which it has done. I am so pleased with the difference
The only problem I have now is that where the space has closed at the front there is a gap in the arch in front of the canine on the right-the left has closed but right will not budge. I have had a powerchain on for sometime and it just doesn't want to go. I have been told I can be debraced at any point and composite added to that area, as I was told I would not some composite for some residual space anyway. I will give it another month or so and if it hasn't moved after then i doubt it will so I will probably choose to be debonded.
Feel free to read my story, which also shows my progress in pictures too.
Re: I cant commit to getting braced. :(
Posted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 5:48 pm
by missblu3
I say go for it! I am going to be braced next Tuesday, I'm 26, and I work in the nursing field. I'm nervous that my coworkers and patients will make fun of me a little, and I'm already sensitive about my teeth. But the positive outcome and self esteem that will come from having a straight toothed smile outweighs those fears. Good luck on your journey!
Re: I cant commit to getting braced. :(
Posted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 10:05 pm
by Tobilei
I say go for it too! I'm 34 and was thinking the same things as you. I have a 13 year old daughter who got her braces on before me and twins who will both be needing them in 2 years. As a teenager my parents were told i didn't need orthodontic work but over time things that were a bit of an issue back then got a whole lot worse.
I too suffer with anxiety and while I have clear braces, I admit that I still feel a bit self conscious about them when I'm talking to people. I've seen a couple of girls at my ortho's office with them too and you really can hardly tell they are there. I've had a few people tell me they didn't even realize I had braces (I guess people who don't have them just don't pay attention, we pay far more attention to it than we should
).
I'm glad I got them on though and really, I have the rest of my life to enjoy having good teeth. 14 months of braces for another 40 odd years (maybe!) of a good smile seems well worth it.
Definitely go with the ortho you feel comfortable with though. Mine is great with adult patients (and with kids). He told me about 40% of his patients these days are adults so you're definitely not alone! I think the 2nd one you saw was rude asking you if you just woke up hating your teeth one day. Of course you didn't! It's never too late to change something you hate. I wouldn't be giving him my money.
Re: I cant commit to getting braced. :(
Posted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 11:50 pm
by klobird
I'm almost 57 and almost done with braces. It's the absolute best decision!! It's weird, but I can feel the respect of other people because I'm doing something just for me, even at my age. Many adults say to me that they've been thinking about getting braces, they just got out of them (I know, it surprises me too how much I hear that one), or they wish they could do something about their teeth. If anyone has made a snotty remark about my braces, I either didn't hear it or don't remember it. People are trying every which way to live outside the box these days--here's your chance--there's no time like the present!! I say GO FOR IT!!
Re: I cant commit to getting braced. :(
Posted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 12:14 am
by Lucy4642
I felt very similar. It is a big commitment and no one wants to go around feeling anxious. But is seems like you already are anxious about your smile and it is affecting you. I'm 50 and 2 months into a two year commitment. I have a very public job and it was hard going to work but is getting easier. It wasn't just a couple of days of self consciousness for me, it is ongoing as I run into people I haven't seen in a while. I suggest going to an orthodontist who treats a lot of adults and take the plunge. There will be times when it is tough on your confidence, but when it is over, you'll be happy with the improvement and that will last a long time. Most adults look younger when they are done. Some lose weight along the way (I haven't). The pain and inconvenience is manageable. for me there has been virtually no pain, just pressure and I got used to it quickly. You can see progress, which is encouraging. and you can always come to this site for support. Go for it! Do it for your future happiness.
Re: I cant commit to getting braced. :(
Posted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 4:45 am
by elainek
Hi Sunshine Ray!
I can also completely relate - I spent years never smiling in pictures, never laughing out loud or hiding behind my hands. Friends used to also comment how I never smiled and looked annoyed in photos but I was so self conscious of people really seeing my teeth. I felt like when I smiled my whole face changed and I was hideous!
I'm 28 now but I first thought about getting braces 5 years ago but talked myself out of it over and over again. Then last year I heard an ad on the radio about adult braces and thought 'that's it - it's now or never!'. If I had just done it 5 years ago I could have had them done twice over. Believe me - if it bothers you as much as you say it does, its never going to go away. You may as well just go for it now!
Now I'm 10 months in and I love my smile, even with braces. I smile all the time, laugh out hugely loud and never have to worry about my teeth (unless I've just eaten of course!). I've also noticed a friend of mine constantly covers his mouth too when he's smiling and I just feel so bad for him that he is so self conscious - I want everyone to get braces because you should never feel self conscious when all you want to do is smile!
Good Luck!!
Re: I cant commit to getting braced. :(
Posted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 8:32 am
by Snowglobe32
Hello there~
I also think you should go ahead and get braces. Imagine how great your life would be if you were happy with your teeth? It obviously bothers you so just do it! It doesn't matter how young or old you are, it matters that your teeth are healthy! For those of us who have had braces, regardless if we have issues smiling or not, it has made our lives better in so many ways! If you don't get them, depending on your bite and condition of your teeth, you may end up needing expensive dental care in the future.
I do have a few concerns, $700??? That is a lot for just a consult with xrays and photos. What happens if you decide not to do it? Do you get that money back? My consult cost $85.00 and my photos/xrays were included in that price. My ortho also offered a small down payment and monthly payments with no interest. 0% interest, you can't find that anywhere these days.
I would highly suggest you find an orthodontist, not a dentist who does braces, because the results my not be ideal. Would you would want a family doctor doing a heart surgery on a loved one? Probably not.
Once you are able to find an ortho that you are comfortable with, let him/her know that you have kids who will need braces. Maybe you can get a great deal when they find out they will have 3 patients instead of one. As for your husband not knowing the full extent of how much it bothers you, just let him know. It is really easy to go online and post a message to people you don't know but who can relate to you...I am sure your husband wants to know and maybe you two can figure out a way to re-arrange your budget.
For me, after about the first month, my braces became a part of me, like my arm. I knew they were there but they didn't get in the way. You wouldn't believe how many people have told me they wished they had gotten braces for whatever reason...so braces just basically means, I care about my teeth and I am lucky to have them!
There are many types of braces, you can do clear, lingual (behind the teeth but more expensive), invisilign...you won't know what will work for you until you get the consult.
I wish you the best of luck!
Re: I cant commit to getting braced. :(
Posted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 12:17 pm
by SunshineRay
Tobilei wrote:I say go for it too! I'm 34 and was thinking the same things as you. I have a 13 year old daughter who got her braces on before me and twins who will both be needing them in 2 years. As a teenager my parents were told i didn't need orthodontic work but over time things that were a bit of an issue back then got a whole lot worse.
I too suffer with anxiety and while I have clear braces, I admit that I still feel a bit self conscious about them when I'm talking to people. I've seen a couple of girls at my ortho's office with them too and you really can hardly tell they are there. I've had a few people tell me they didn't even realize I had braces (I guess people who don't have them just don't pay attention, we pay far more attention to it than we should
).
I'm glad I got them on though and really, I have the rest of my life to enjoy having good teeth. 14 months of braces for another 40 odd years (maybe!) of a good smile seems well worth it.
Definitely go with the ortho you feel comfortable with though. Mine is great with adult patients (and with kids). He told me about 40% of his patients these days are adults so you're definitely not alone! I think the 2nd one you saw was rude asking you if you just woke up hating your teeth one day. Of course you didn't! It's never too late to change something you hate. I wouldn't be giving him my money.
clear braces? I get so confused with all the names.....damon, ibraces, the behind the teeth ones, invisalign, etc. Whats the name of yours?
Re: I cant commit to getting braced. :(
Posted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 12:23 pm
by SunshineRay
snowglobe- I also think the $700 is alot. If I go with this office then the money will be put toward my braces.....if I go somewhere else or just dont do it then I lose the money. I am very comfy with the office but I cant make myself pay the $700 in case I back out. I live in a very small town and we have only 1 true ortho and that was the rude guy I met with. Most of the dentists offices do everything....general, ortho, cosmetic etc. The closest city that would have ortho only dentists would probably be at least an hour away.
Re: I cant commit to getting braced. :(
Posted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 12:36 pm
by MrsCharisma
Angel269 wrote:Hi SunshineRay
I can 100% relate to you. I had a midline diastema too and always looked so miserable-could never open my mouth, or talk in public to people in fear they were staring at my teeth and smiling-forget it!
My son (18 months) has also inherited my teeth so I think that the motivation to address my teeth was because I knew he would need to address his a teen and I kind of had a brace fear myself (mainly due to the metal appearance and fear of pain, which then provoked a general dental fear).
I had upper ceramic braces (wanted to be as discreet as I could with it, especially as I have a tooth coloured archwire too) put on late June 2012 to close my diastema, which it has done. I am so pleased with the difference
The only problem I have now is that where the space has closed at the front there is a gap in the arch in front of the canine on the right-the left has closed but right will not budge. I have had a powerchain on for sometime and it just doesn't want to go. I have been told I can be debraced at any point and composite added to that area, as I was told I would not some composite for some residual space anyway. I will give it another month or so and if it hasn't moved after then i doubt it will so I will probably choose to be debonded.
Feel free to read my story, which also shows my progress in pictures too.
FYI - I have a 5-6 mm midline diastema, my dad does as well. My daughter had a 3-4 mm diastema in her primary teeth and when her permanent teeth came in? PERFECT! Perfectly aligned, straight teeth!
Re: I cant commit to getting braced. :(
Posted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 1:32 pm
by Okate
Hello I'm new! Get them done! You sound like me I also have two kids. I am 30 and I am paying £250 for initial consultation plus other costs that are outrageous. Us girls deserve to feel pretty x