SARPE and Expanders: My Reader's Digest Version
Posted: Fri Dec 08, 2006 7:49 pm
Hi guys.
I posted this in one of Jean and Kim's messages, but I thought it might be handy to have it as a stand alone topic too. It's my summary of my experiences with the expander and surgery (I had SARPE and septal reconstruction), which I hope is helpful to some of you out there going through the same thing. You are SO not alone!
1. First week after expander fitted: This thing is awful. I can't swallow. Which is fantastic, since I am producing the world's largest amount of saliva. (I actually walked around work with a drool cup!). And I can't talk properly. I tried to order flowers for my partner's mother, whose father just died, and the woman couldn't understand my rendition of their address. This is horrible. I shall cry. And how do I chew with this thing in??
2. Second week after expander fitted: I sound slightly mentally retarded, but have finally worked out how to make "s" sounds. Let's get this surgery over so this object has a purpose.
3. Surgery: Hmm that went okay. Morphine is goood.
4. First few days after surgery: This is frickin awful. I look like my head has been bashed in. I can't walk down stairs unaided. How can it be this bad? This is evil. I am a masochist. These drugs aren't enough. I wake up every 4 hours in pain. Honey, get me some more drugs. Oh hang on I can't speak, let me write it down. And can I have a seventh pillow please?
5. 5-15 days after surgery: Oh man I am tired of this liquid diet. But it hurts to bite down. I wonder what else I can puree.... At least I don't need the drugs as much anymore. But I am borrrred. Take these darned things out of my nostrils so I don't need this drip tray!! Hmm... And when I turn the key it literally feels like my head is separating. It makes me rather dizzy. Note to self: turn at night, just before bed.
6. First month while turning: Hmm okay, gnocchi is good.... And there is a big gap now- it opened slowly in the beginning but now its going great guns. I wonder if I can stick a drinking straw through it. Oh yes I can. Look Pete, I can stick a straw through my gap!
7. Second month of turning: Oh for God's sake I am sick of this. I look like a Jack-o-lantern. Just when I had learned to speak again I have effectively lost my front teeth and now have a new lisp. Dr. Lam, please can I stop turning. Please.....
8. Months after I stopped turning: Woohoo! No more freaky head-splitting-open. But would you please close up gap. Maybe if I stroke my teeth and encourage them. No that's not working. Oh hang on.... they're going... Yay!
9. 6 months after surgery: My teeth are still. Fixed, unmoving. I can pronounce everything except a British/Australian "new" sound. It's these small things that make you a happy happy woman.
10. Expander off, braces on: Hallelujah! Braces rock. They rock because I feel no pain, I don't have to do anything, they get (mostly) better and not worse, and I CAN TOUCH THE ROOF OF MY MOUTH AFTER 8 MONTHS!!
I hope my journey at least helps you feel normal when you have those down moments. Best wishes to everyone out there on the journey!![Very Happy :D](./images/smilies/icon_biggrin.gif)
I posted this in one of Jean and Kim's messages, but I thought it might be handy to have it as a stand alone topic too. It's my summary of my experiences with the expander and surgery (I had SARPE and septal reconstruction), which I hope is helpful to some of you out there going through the same thing. You are SO not alone!
1. First week after expander fitted: This thing is awful. I can't swallow. Which is fantastic, since I am producing the world's largest amount of saliva. (I actually walked around work with a drool cup!). And I can't talk properly. I tried to order flowers for my partner's mother, whose father just died, and the woman couldn't understand my rendition of their address. This is horrible. I shall cry. And how do I chew with this thing in??
2. Second week after expander fitted: I sound slightly mentally retarded, but have finally worked out how to make "s" sounds. Let's get this surgery over so this object has a purpose.
3. Surgery: Hmm that went okay. Morphine is goood.
4. First few days after surgery: This is frickin awful. I look like my head has been bashed in. I can't walk down stairs unaided. How can it be this bad? This is evil. I am a masochist. These drugs aren't enough. I wake up every 4 hours in pain. Honey, get me some more drugs. Oh hang on I can't speak, let me write it down. And can I have a seventh pillow please?
5. 5-15 days after surgery: Oh man I am tired of this liquid diet. But it hurts to bite down. I wonder what else I can puree.... At least I don't need the drugs as much anymore. But I am borrrred. Take these darned things out of my nostrils so I don't need this drip tray!! Hmm... And when I turn the key it literally feels like my head is separating. It makes me rather dizzy. Note to self: turn at night, just before bed.
6. First month while turning: Hmm okay, gnocchi is good.... And there is a big gap now- it opened slowly in the beginning but now its going great guns. I wonder if I can stick a drinking straw through it. Oh yes I can. Look Pete, I can stick a straw through my gap!
7. Second month of turning: Oh for God's sake I am sick of this. I look like a Jack-o-lantern. Just when I had learned to speak again I have effectively lost my front teeth and now have a new lisp. Dr. Lam, please can I stop turning. Please.....
8. Months after I stopped turning: Woohoo! No more freaky head-splitting-open. But would you please close up gap. Maybe if I stroke my teeth and encourage them. No that's not working. Oh hang on.... they're going... Yay!
9. 6 months after surgery: My teeth are still. Fixed, unmoving. I can pronounce everything except a British/Australian "new" sound. It's these small things that make you a happy happy woman.
10. Expander off, braces on: Hallelujah! Braces rock. They rock because I feel no pain, I don't have to do anything, they get (mostly) better and not worse, and I CAN TOUCH THE ROOF OF MY MOUTH AFTER 8 MONTHS!!
I hope my journey at least helps you feel normal when you have those down moments. Best wishes to everyone out there on the journey!
![Very Happy :D](./images/smilies/icon_biggrin.gif)