Hi, I'm brand spanking new to this forum, but I saw your post and I thought I might chime in with what I "know". Keep in mine, I'm not an expert and I haven't gotten my braces/surgery yet. BUt I have done a lot of research and seen three orthodontists so far. Any of the very knowledgeable ppl on this board, please feel free to correct me where I go wrong.
OK, first off, if this ortho makes you feel like an idiot now, it's probably not going to get any better over the course of treatment. And if you're unhappy with your final result you won't have the confidence to make him fix what you see wrong. So your instinct to go somewhere else and get another opinion is spot on.
Second, I went to two orthos (one in Los Angeles, one at a dental school in Virginia) that told me my problem is purely dental and needed extractions which I am not OK with. If my problem is purely dental, why do I need extractions?? I finally saw one who told me I had a narrow palate and surgical expansion could fix it completely, no extractions necessary. Again, you seem to be on the right track with trying to avoid extraction, as you can't undo extractions.
I'm 28 and am definitely done growing. My palate can be expanded, but they need to cut open my jaw to make it happen. In your case, since you're so young, there is a small chance that you're not done growing. Actually, more specifically, there's a tiny chance that your bones haven't fused together. If that's the case (I think they can check with X-Rays?) then you might be able to expand your jaw without surgery, and without extractions. But, if your jaw is finished growing and fusing, there's not much I'm aware of that will truly expand your palate, short of surgically assisted expansion (called SARPE).
Unfortunately, you're probably just going to have to visit a few orthos before you find one that you jive with. Some doctors seem to think the only correct answer is theirs. But, it's your face, you know what your comfortable with, and you have access to the internet to do some 'homework" about your condition. I think if you give it enough time, and you visit enough doctors, you'll have no problem finding someone who will work with you.
The ortho I finally found is out in the 'burbs. I don't think location has as much to do with finding the right DR. as just having the perseverance to go out and do a ton of consultations until you find him/her! I hope that helps!
