How can I get my 7 1/2 year old daughter to get her expander
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How can I get my 7 1/2 year old daughter to get her expander
Help? I could really use the advise on how to get my daughter to get her expander in? The other week, I took her out of school for an orthodontist appointment. She was getting her braces on the back teeth fitted and then the mouth mold for the roof of her mouth, but everytime the girl tried to fit the brace around her teeth my daughter was screaming because she was scared and nervous. There were other children in the room getting the same thing done and they were not screaming but my daugher was. So, they pushed back her appointments till April 8 for another try at the fitting of the back braces and we will have to go through this all over again. How do I get her to understand that they are not there to hurt her and she needs to get this done. She is one that does not do well at the dentist either. Just something about other people being in her mouth makes her scared and nervous. Is this an orthodontist that would put her to sleep? So this can be done? Help!?!
First, have a different person work with her. Some of the gals at our ortho office are just better with the little ones than others. And they have special tricks to get things done.
My daughter had to have the molds done twice. (The first set didn't come out good enough). The first time, she was crying and upset, felt like she was choking, I was a bit scared she would never go back. The second time she had a girl that was much more experienced, and got the job done a lot faster. She also uses the trick of having the child sit up and lean forward just a bit. It sits them so the plaster falls out of their mouth rather than towards their throat. Night and day, those experiences.
My daughter had to have the molds done twice. (The first set didn't come out good enough). The first time, she was crying and upset, felt like she was choking, I was a bit scared she would never go back. The second time she had a girl that was much more experienced, and got the job done a lot faster. She also uses the trick of having the child sit up and lean forward just a bit. It sits them so the plaster falls out of their mouth rather than towards their throat. Night and day, those experiences.
Thank you! Those are some good tips! I appreciate the advise. Knowing that there are other moms or parents out there that are going through the same thing I am. I try to talk to my daughter when she is crying and screaming and tell her that she might be scaring the other kids that are getting the same thing done. I have been talking to her about it so that she might be better when we go again in April. If you can think of anything else to help me out I would greatly appreciate it! Thank you!
I wouldn't tell my daughter she was scaring other kids. She would stop her fit long enough to give me a lesson in worrying about HER and not about what the other kids were doing. I'm sure it would include something about if all theother kids were jumping off a bridge.... 
Really, I've just tried hard to include her in the decision making. If I get her buy-in, things are a lot easier. She has certain girls she likes better than others, and she loves the orthodontist. They are really good about explaining things to her and letting her ask questions (they complimented me on teaching her to be proactive about her care!)
She had to have a baby tooth pulled. It was over a month from the time they asked us to have it done and when we did it. It took that long for her to agree to have it done. I'm okay with adding a bit of time to the treatment if it means having her be more comfortable with the process.
Really, I've just tried hard to include her in the decision making. If I get her buy-in, things are a lot easier. She has certain girls she likes better than others, and she loves the orthodontist. They are really good about explaining things to her and letting her ask questions (they complimented me on teaching her to be proactive about her care!)
She had to have a baby tooth pulled. It was over a month from the time they asked us to have it done and when we did it. It took that long for her to agree to have it done. I'm okay with adding a bit of time to the treatment if it means having her be more comfortable with the process.
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purpleteeth
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Is she ready to handle braces and the process of othodontics? She is 7.5 and maybe she just isnt ready yet.... I don't know, but orthodontics is something that is going to require a child or an adult to take extra responsiblity for their mouth. Could you possibly put it off until she is a little more mature and able to hande it? Is that an option right now?? I am just throwing this out as a possiblity.
Have you talked with your childs doctor about this? Maybe the doctor can give her something to help her relax before the appointment so the molds etc can be done. If this is a medical issue, possibly getting the child's doctor involved might help the situation some.
What about talking with the orthodontist staff and asking them what tips and suggestions they have for you to help her relax before she gets there and during the procedure? Can she bring in her stuffed animal? Will they let her listen to her headphones?
Have you asked her what exactly makes her so scared when she is in there? Is it the smells, the tastes, the sounds?? What is the root of her fear and try going from there??? Each office has different tactics they can use to help with the aversion and fear. My ortho's office has flavored gloves and plays music, for example.
Each office has different things they can do to help someone feel more comfortable. I have ALWAYS BEEN DENTAL PHOBIC and I struggle everytime I go, but it is nearly every 6 weeks now, so I am having to come up with new "tricks" to keep me in the chair and not running out of the room. I picked my ortho's office because I felt comfortable there and they had ways to help me combat my fears of being in there, the biggest of which is they play loud music during the exams (loud enough to be able to hear every word of the song and still be able to hear what the tech's and dr are saying). They showed me ways to help with the taste problems too... which makes me gag.
I am not "pro-medication" or anything like that and I would not give my child medication before going to the dentist or othodonist at such a young age unless the procedure was a very time critical/ health critical issue.
Have you talked with your childs doctor about this? Maybe the doctor can give her something to help her relax before the appointment so the molds etc can be done. If this is a medical issue, possibly getting the child's doctor involved might help the situation some.
What about talking with the orthodontist staff and asking them what tips and suggestions they have for you to help her relax before she gets there and during the procedure? Can she bring in her stuffed animal? Will they let her listen to her headphones?
Have you asked her what exactly makes her so scared when she is in there? Is it the smells, the tastes, the sounds?? What is the root of her fear and try going from there??? Each office has different tactics they can use to help with the aversion and fear. My ortho's office has flavored gloves and plays music, for example.
Each office has different things they can do to help someone feel more comfortable. I have ALWAYS BEEN DENTAL PHOBIC and I struggle everytime I go, but it is nearly every 6 weeks now, so I am having to come up with new "tricks" to keep me in the chair and not running out of the room. I picked my ortho's office because I felt comfortable there and they had ways to help me combat my fears of being in there, the biggest of which is they play loud music during the exams (loud enough to be able to hear every word of the song and still be able to hear what the tech's and dr are saying). They showed me ways to help with the taste problems too... which makes me gag.
I am not "pro-medication" or anything like that and I would not give my child medication before going to the dentist or othodonist at such a young age unless the procedure was a very time critical/ health critical issue.
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Well, I have had the ladies that work at the orthodontist office talk to her and told her step by step on what they would be doing. They told her that it shouldn't hurt her but if something would be uncomfortable that she should tell them. She understood but as the lady is trying to lay the brace on the tooth to see if it fits she starts crying and screaming. I tried talking to her and told her she would be ok, that it might feel different but she was in good hands. The girl stopped what she was doing and talk to my daughter again. She really needs the expander in because the adult teeth are not coming up and making the baby teeth loose that they come out. So, the baby teeth are still in and the adult teeth are coming in behind the baby teeth. She is basically, starting a second row of teeth. It is really different looking. I have contacted her doctor and they let me try once the pill that will calm you down, zyapan? It did nothing for her. I really was not up to giving her that but they wanted her to take a low dose so that she might calm down some. The head doctor or orthodontist talked to us and said that we need to wait a month or two and just keep talking to her and tell her that her health comes first but they will not force her to do anything that she does not want to do. That they will work with her till she is ready to try it on her on decision. My daughter told me that she is just scared and nervous about the whole thing. Having people in her mouth and feeling like she might swallow something or gag on something. That is what she told me when I asked her what was so scarey about the expander experience. I told her that they only way she would swallow something is if she bumps the tech that is working on her mouth.
I can ask about her bringing in a stuffed animal or able to listen to her headphones if that might help her. Thank you! That is some great advise!
I greatly appreciate all you advise!
I can ask about her bringing in a stuffed animal or able to listen to her headphones if that might help her. Thank you! That is some great advise!
I greatly appreciate all you advise!
Well, they are being patient with her and that's important!
My DD was nervous as well. After the first couple appointments she was a pro. She was the one that asked about braces, though, so I had her buy-in when we started the process. (She's 9 now, had the expander put in just after she turned 8 )
Does she have any friends in Phase I with braces or an expander? Maybe they could ease her fears with their experiences.
One of my daughter's friends - every tooth she has lost has been pulled by the dentist. A tooth gets loose, the adult tooth comes in behind it and tightens up the baby tooth, they head to the dentist to get the baby tooth pulled. It's just another day to her.
I'm not a professional, so this is just from my own research and question asking... You have a bit of a cushion for the expander. Your daughter has a few years before the palate starts fusing, which is when expansion becomes a lot more uncomfortable. What are they expecting to accomplish with the expander? I'm thinking with my mind's eye - it is going to create room in the arch, but not prevent the adult teeth from coming in behind the baby teeth. If you have the baby teeth pulled, the adult teeth should move into place, and maybe the expander won't be necessary? Just thinking out loud. Anyway, my point is that if she doesn't come around, you probably won't lose anything by waiting a year or so until she is ready.
My DD was nervous as well. After the first couple appointments she was a pro. She was the one that asked about braces, though, so I had her buy-in when we started the process. (She's 9 now, had the expander put in just after she turned 8 )
Does she have any friends in Phase I with braces or an expander? Maybe they could ease her fears with their experiences.
One of my daughter's friends - every tooth she has lost has been pulled by the dentist. A tooth gets loose, the adult tooth comes in behind it and tightens up the baby tooth, they head to the dentist to get the baby tooth pulled. It's just another day to her.
I'm not a professional, so this is just from my own research and question asking... You have a bit of a cushion for the expander. Your daughter has a few years before the palate starts fusing, which is when expansion becomes a lot more uncomfortable. What are they expecting to accomplish with the expander? I'm thinking with my mind's eye - it is going to create room in the arch, but not prevent the adult teeth from coming in behind the baby teeth. If you have the baby teeth pulled, the adult teeth should move into place, and maybe the expander won't be necessary? Just thinking out loud. Anyway, my point is that if she doesn't come around, you probably won't lose anything by waiting a year or so until she is ready.
How long do expanders stay in?
She does have a couple of friends that have had them in and there is one girl in her 2nd grade class that has one in at this time. I have asked her friend to talk to her or for my daughter to talk to her friend about it. Just to let her see that it is ok to go through with this and that her friend "survived" the procedure. I even thought about taking her friend along just to comfort her while she is getting it done but then I didn't know if that would be a desperate way to get the expander in or a smart one at that.
I guess as you say, they want to get this procedure going before the roof of her mouth fuses together. They do want her to keep coming for her appointments even if it is to just sit in the chair and to be more familiar with her environment. To also see other children that are getting the same things done.
I guess this is harder on me because I want to get the ball rolling and want to see my daughers beauitful smile at the end but I know it is going to be along road before we will get there. I just keep praying that she will come to, and be ready to start this journey and to be brave and face it head on. My nerves are shot just because I worry of what will she be like at the next visit. She did so-so when she got the seperators in but after that she wouldn't work with them.
I guess you are right, it might come to waiting another year till she matures more and can handle it.
She does have a couple of friends that have had them in and there is one girl in her 2nd grade class that has one in at this time. I have asked her friend to talk to her or for my daughter to talk to her friend about it. Just to let her see that it is ok to go through with this and that her friend "survived" the procedure. I even thought about taking her friend along just to comfort her while she is getting it done but then I didn't know if that would be a desperate way to get the expander in or a smart one at that.
I guess as you say, they want to get this procedure going before the roof of her mouth fuses together. They do want her to keep coming for her appointments even if it is to just sit in the chair and to be more familiar with her environment. To also see other children that are getting the same things done.
I guess this is harder on me because I want to get the ball rolling and want to see my daughers beauitful smile at the end but I know it is going to be along road before we will get there. I just keep praying that she will come to, and be ready to start this journey and to be brave and face it head on. My nerves are shot just because I worry of what will she be like at the next visit. She did so-so when she got the seperators in but after that she wouldn't work with them.
I guess you are right, it might come to waiting another year till she matures more and can handle it.
My DD had her expander in for the better part of a year - probably 10 months. We only turned it for the first 2-3 weeks and then it was just a place holder. The ortho likes to leave it in place as long as possible to reduce the % of "shrinkage".
I know one of DDs friend's had an expander in only for a few months. She has already been told she will need to have another expander, so I was perfectly happy to let this one sit a while.
I've taken some flack (in other areas) for allowing my DD to have too much of an opinion. But I have found that with her approval, things go a lot smoother. If it's not life and death, I'm willing to work with her to make life easier. (She pulls out her eyelashes and eyebrows when she is stressed, so I try to be the one to ease stress rather than create it)
If I were to ask my daughter right now, she would say that besides the first round of molds, the separators have been the worst part!
I know one of DDs friend's had an expander in only for a few months. She has already been told she will need to have another expander, so I was perfectly happy to let this one sit a while.
I've taken some flack (in other areas) for allowing my DD to have too much of an opinion. But I have found that with her approval, things go a lot smoother. If it's not life and death, I'm willing to work with her to make life easier. (She pulls out her eyelashes and eyebrows when she is stressed, so I try to be the one to ease stress rather than create it)
If I were to ask my daughter right now, she would say that besides the first round of molds, the separators have been the worst part!
Thank you for the advise and what I might have to look forward to in the near future. For me I am the type of person that is ready to get this expander on and deal with it. But, my daughter is thinking differently. So, I guess if I have to we will just go everytime and see if we will make progress and go from there.
So, how have things been going?
Any new appointments?
I also have a child with severe anxiety. He had a poor experience getting his space maintainers in last year at the ortho and he doesn't care for them at all. We've been to 4 other orthos to find one that he feels comfortable with and I think we found one finally!
They said they'd take it slow, just like you're experiencing.
I, too, am going to be getting braced so we're doing this together and I'm going to get mine before he does his. Kind of a way to get him to see how things go, get comfortable with their office, and know what's going to happen to him.
He's only getting 4 brackets on his front permanent teeth and the bands on the back teeth with coils in between to help expand his palate a bit. He will be in them for a year and then we'll do phase 2 when all his adult teeth are in to correct his overbite.
My child has tics and other nervous behaviors like stomach problems, etc. so I understand where you're coming from! Keep us posted!
Bonnie
Any new appointments?
I also have a child with severe anxiety. He had a poor experience getting his space maintainers in last year at the ortho and he doesn't care for them at all. We've been to 4 other orthos to find one that he feels comfortable with and I think we found one finally!
They said they'd take it slow, just like you're experiencing.
I, too, am going to be getting braced so we're doing this together and I'm going to get mine before he does his. Kind of a way to get him to see how things go, get comfortable with their office, and know what's going to happen to him.
He's only getting 4 brackets on his front permanent teeth and the bands on the back teeth with coils in between to help expand his palate a bit. He will be in them for a year and then we'll do phase 2 when all his adult teeth are in to correct his overbite.
My child has tics and other nervous behaviors like stomach problems, etc. so I understand where you're coming from! Keep us posted!
Bonnie
My Update with my now 8 year old daughter.
Well, we have been to the ortho for the second time. The first week she got the spacers in and she just layed there and she did cooperate. It was easy as can be. I thought to myself, "we are finally going to get somewhere"!!! Then the next week came! She went right back to being very nervous. Once she got in the chair she looked at me and started to cry. She got herself all worked up. The girl tried to put in the first brace on the upper back tooth. My daughter started to gag and cry and then grabbed the girls arm and she couldn't let go because she was holding the brace to fit on her tooth. Once she got ahold of it she pulled it out. My daughter started to cry more. Then once we got her settled down she just wouldn't open her mouth anymore. The doctor came in and talked to her and worked with her but still they didn't get anywhere. So, we now have to wait till June to try again. That is all they can recommend for her is to just keep having her come back and keep trying. Eventually she is to come around. The funny thing is the expander is paid for and it is not even in her mouth yet. I just really wish they had something to calm her down so that this can be done! Is there any suck thing as a sedation orthodontist???
Did you ask the ortho if they'd be willing to give her something like laughing gas? It seems it would really help her. Then she wouldn't have to keep going back and having it drag on.
My seven year old needs an expander, and I have been talking to her about it for some time. She is aware that this will help her teeth and avoid major problems like I am dealing with now as an adult. She doesn't have it in yet. We'll see how that goes.
My seven year old needs an expander, and I have been talking to her about it for some time. She is aware that this will help her teeth and avoid major problems like I am dealing with now as an adult. She doesn't have it in yet. We'll see how that goes.
RPE in on Jan 7, 2008
SARPE on Jan 11, 2008 expanded 7 mm
RPE out on May 14, 2008
I asked if they could put her out to get this done but they said that for the fitting she had to be await to have that done. She needs to bite down on a tooth bruch that doesn' t have bristles on it and that slides the band around the tooth. Believe me I am at my wits end and wish they could do something with laughing gas!!!
My daughter knows all the steps that she has to go through and we talk about it a lot. To go back a moment, she had out a couple of years ago her anoides because she is a mouth breather. That helped but she still breaths through her mouth. The doctor/orthodontist said that the expander will help with her breathing because it will open up the nasal area while it is expanding the roof of her mouth. That will help with all the crowded teeth. So, I have been talking to her to tell her that it is all for her health and she needs to get this done.
Let me know how you make out with your daughter. If you get any kind of advice while she is in there let me know! I could really use it!
Thanks!
My daughter knows all the steps that she has to go through and we talk about it a lot. To go back a moment, she had out a couple of years ago her anoides because she is a mouth breather. That helped but she still breaths through her mouth. The doctor/orthodontist said that the expander will help with her breathing because it will open up the nasal area while it is expanding the roof of her mouth. That will help with all the crowded teeth. So, I have been talking to her to tell her that it is all for her health and she needs to get this done.
Let me know how you make out with your daughter. If you get any kind of advice while she is in there let me know! I could really use it!
Thanks!