30 years late and right on time! Brace day at last!

[SnaggleTooth Sam]

I just got braces put on in advance of my 43rd birthday!

I can feel the pressure starting to manifest itself. I had the upper teeth done today and return for the lowers in five weeks.
The nice lady at the Orthodontist's office mentioned that in about three hours I would be feeling it for real......

I'm not unique, I have had a horrible smile for a long time. I'm glad I'm getting this addressed.

The physical and temporal pain of fixing my teeth probably doesn't compare to the heartache and self loathing I have been carrying around for thirty years. I know that sounds extreme, but as I look back on photos from years gone by, my closed lip smile always seems sad, people always ask "why are you frowning in all of your pictures or why so serious all the time?". Those rare photos of me baring my teeth make me cringe, make me want to want to smash something. Years of parental neglect, compounded by years of my own laziness, the world always placing something else in my way that absorbs the money, those years are at the start of their end.

Oh Lord but how I have been looking forward to smiling like a drunk fool with my daughter, my girlfriend, my brothers. I hope my deceased parents are somewhere where they can see me baring these gleaming metal capsules of liberation as wide as my lips allow.

Here goes nothing. Here goes everything.

Let the sweet pain of progress commence.

[rhomboid]

I hope and trust that your gleaming metal capsules provide you with the satisfaction and reward that you deserve. Best of luck!

[revontuli]

Congratulations! Welcome to the club!

[Snowglobe32]

The physical and temporal pain of fixing my teeth probably doesn't compare to the heartache and self loathing I have been carrying around for thirty years. .. Those rare photos of me baring my teeth make me cringe, make me want to want to smash something. Years of parental neglect, compounded by years of my own laziness, the world always placing something else in my way that absorbs the money, those years are at the start of their end.

Here goes nothing. Here goes everything.

.

I love everything you wrote above! You wrote how a lot of people feel.
Congratulations - you are on your way to a new beginning!

Good Luck!

[SnaggleTooth Sam]

Thank you snowglobe. I appreciate the kind words.

I wrote this note almost immediately after I was braced.

I'm now almost twelve hours into the treatment. Much like when my daughter was born, time is moving in a completely non-linear manner.

I have been fortunate in my lack of serious discomfort so far. It could all change in the morning, but I am enjoying the pain. I haven't taken a single pain reliever at all.

I know this may appear masochistic or something, but I am finding that the physical issues are as important as the end result. There is something important to me spiritually about the transformation and experiencing it to it's fullest. The rebirth and renewal of ourselves through our outward appearance is something we should be embracing and cherishing for its own sake.

I lost my mother to Alzheimers and she was very young. I learned through this, that the sum of our existence can be measured by the memories we carry with us and the memories we leave in others and that every moment of every day is precious, irrespective of it's issues or discomforts.

I apologize f this seems winded or vague. It's hard to quantify in simple terms. This is a big step for me and I suppose my feelings are all over the place. Like any other life altering decision, this one is making me think a lot.

I'll finish the thought with the following end of day anecdote. It was really really really wonderful to come home from my office and my daughter and all the neighborhood kids came charging in to see me and stare at my newly braced choppers. We had a grand old time reading the instructions and discussing colors and options etc... when we got to the part where the prohibited foods list said NO GUMMI BEARS we all groaned as though we had been mortally wounded.

[WebDevGirl]

The physical and temporal pain of fixing my teeth probably doesn't compare to the heartache and self loathing I have been carrying around for thirty years. .. Those rare photos of me baring my teeth make me cringe, make me want to want to smash something. Years of parental neglect, compounded by years of my own laziness, the world always placing something else in my way that absorbs the money, those years are at the start of their end.

This made my eyes go a bit misty, this is exactly how i felt. I've always needed them and have never smiled big because i didn't want to show my teeth. Years of my own neglect forced me to both try to ignore them and obsess over thinking about my teeth. Any time i saw someone with a big bright smile i would feel so ashamed.

I almost feel that the discomfort that i have with the braces and expander are good because it helps me feel... absolved of the guilt i've had over taking care of my teeth so poorly. So yah this is a pain but i've working hard to care for them NOW and it can only get better from here!!

[Sandpiper]

I've been moved reading your deep thoughts, SnaggleTooth Sam - I think there are quite a few of us shedding the skin of our former selves through this process, and feeling that the external and internal discomfort is a sort of rebirth process.....a beautiful butterfly waiting to emerge from the ugly chrysalis. I'm very close to 43 myself, and I'm so glad I'm doing this, even when the changes seem minisicule and the time interminable. Hang in there, and I look forward to following your progress.

[petal]

I was touched by your post. I am 40 and it feels so good to be doing this for myself. My new motto is: In my life I will lead with my smile...braces or not! I read a blog where the woman said that when she found someone staring at her braces she would smile and say, "yeah, I just got a new lipgloss, do you like it?". She enjoyed the different reactions that she received. I am finding that people I know, that I thought had a ton of confidence are hurting over the condition of their teeth. I think that many of my friends now have brace envy! My mom-in-law has alzheimers....it has made me look at life differently. I will enjoy this ride to becoming my best self and I hope you do too! I wish you all the best!