It's amazing how much time heals things and how few the times are now that I come on this website. I was always more of a lurker than a regular poster anyway, but in the first few weeks after surgery, I did come on here all the time and post many questions and look for support in the darkest days after surgery.
The body really does know how to block out so much of the negative memories of surgery over time; it's like anything in that regard; I've never had children, but I've had mothers say the same thing, hence why many choose to go through childbirth again!
If I had to do it all over again, I know I could do it. (I had both lower and upper - 5mm widened up top and 2 mm tilted down with 7 mm moved forward on the lower.) It's by far the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life, but I have absolutely no regrets.
I was banded shut for 4 weeks with a splint in for 5 weeks. I remember crying over the sink as I syringed in yet another "meal" in through the spaces in my teeth and asking myself every day "why on this earth did I decide to do this?" At the most for the first couple of weeks I had maybe 2 - 3 hours a night of fitful sleep, propped up, trying desperately not to roll on my side. I became amazed at my body's ability to cope with learning to breathe entirely through my nose while banded shut while in the meantime struggling with sinus congestion. I remember feeling like from the pressure of being banded shut, that my face was in constant strain and tension, and not wanting to take the narcotics, but not having a choice, for me to find any relief. I remember feeling major euphoria in the hospital, to coming home and crashing, and not being able to enjoy or do anything - read, watch TV, or relax whatsoever. I remember the countdown to every single post op appointment at the hospital, and wanting to hug and kiss my surgeon the day he cut the bands off! I remember worrying about every single little possible question or scenario that I conjured up in my mind, including, but not limited to - where my stitches were as I never saw any, my range of motion and getting my jaws back to opening after they'd be closed for so long, relapse worries, plus much more.
But it's all a distant memory, and I only look forward from here. I am thrilled with my new bite. I've had so many people compliment me on how my face is shaped now, and what my teeth and bite look like. I love how I can feel my top teeth just slightly overlap my bottom teeth in a perfect setting. I love how my new smile looks. I love that I can breathe through my nose when all of my life before surgery, I was a mouth breather. I love my distinct jawline. I love my new found confidence. Most importantly, I love that I had the strength to do this.
Yes, my chewing abilities are not perfect - I've learned it takes a really, really, really long time to train your jaws and teeth to chew food in a position they've never had before. Especially when there is still a lot of numbness to work with. Yes, my chin, gums and teeth still have numbness; it's SLOWLY improving, and who knows if it will 100% come back, but I'll take what I have, I can work with it. Yes, my range of motion is not entirely back yet, I can open my jaws 35mm fully, but as far as I'm concerned, that's enough to fit a biteful of whatever in there, so I don't care! I have learned to adapt, and marvel at what our bodies can handle and how they manage with what they've been given.
To those going through the "dark days" or about to go through this journey, I can tell you, that this 32 year old woman has no regrets whatsoever and you should be proud of what you've decided to do. At the end of the day, this is a choice; and I know I made the right choice. I know everyone has different experiences and has different outcomes, but I hope this inspires and reassures some of you out there, as I know I needed reassurance back in June when I went through this myself.
A 5 1/2 month post op update - keep your chin up!
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bracesat30
- Posts: 52
- Joined: Tue May 26, 2009 9:46 am
It was really cool to read your post. I've just hit the 4 month post-op mark and was thinking the same thing yesterday.
I wasn't banded shut for as long as you - only 2 weeks but that was enough to send me potty. My lowest point was screaming on the bathroom floor in agony with my stiff morning jaw 1 week post-op and my fiance having to inject liquid codeine into the gaps between my teeth.
I still have only 2 finger width mouth opening and chewing is still extremely hard. Most of my food gets a couple of crushes with my molars then goes straight down so can't be good for my digestive system.
But like you, I've had so many compliments on my new rounder/shorter face (it was long and narrow before) and my bite is all the way around whereas before it was a big over/openbite.
The biggest issue I still have is stiffness in my chin. I can deal with the slight numbness still but the stiffness does bother me and range of motion when talking. I still have a slight lisp and permanently sound as if I have a cold.
My biggest concern at the moment is when I laugh, I get pain under my right nostril and worry it's a loose screw! Cripes!
Like you I spent a good proportion of the first month at least regretting it all. I was unlucky because I had to have my plate removed 2 weeks ago due to a loose bone fragment causing inflammation and infection from day one. Sigh - but reading your post has reminded me how it is and will be worth it in the end - thank you!
I wasn't banded shut for as long as you - only 2 weeks but that was enough to send me potty. My lowest point was screaming on the bathroom floor in agony with my stiff morning jaw 1 week post-op and my fiance having to inject liquid codeine into the gaps between my teeth.
I still have only 2 finger width mouth opening and chewing is still extremely hard. Most of my food gets a couple of crushes with my molars then goes straight down so can't be good for my digestive system.
But like you, I've had so many compliments on my new rounder/shorter face (it was long and narrow before) and my bite is all the way around whereas before it was a big over/openbite.
The biggest issue I still have is stiffness in my chin. I can deal with the slight numbness still but the stiffness does bother me and range of motion when talking. I still have a slight lisp and permanently sound as if I have a cold.
My biggest concern at the moment is when I laugh, I get pain under my right nostril and worry it's a loose screw! Cripes!
Like you I spent a good proportion of the first month at least regretting it all. I was unlucky because I had to have my plate removed 2 weeks ago due to a loose bone fragment causing inflammation and infection from day one. Sigh - but reading your post has reminded me how it is and will be worth it in the end - thank you!
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sauerkraut
- Posts: 573
- Joined: Tue Sep 04, 2007 2:57 pm
- Location: Germany
Great Post!!! Thanks for sharing.
I think we all can relate to your story in some regards...I'm only 2.5 months out and I have many of the lingering effects that you do. I remember saying for the first 3 weeks why on earth did I do this.
It is still pretty fresh in my mind, but each day it becomes more of a memory.
And for those looking for inspiration...Put me in the camp of being glad I finally did it. And, I'd do it again (although I freely admit I certainly wouldn't want to!!).
-Chicago29
I think we all can relate to your story in some regards...I'm only 2.5 months out and I have many of the lingering effects that you do. I remember saying for the first 3 weeks why on earth did I do this.
It is still pretty fresh in my mind, but each day it becomes more of a memory.
And for those looking for inspiration...Put me in the camp of being glad I finally did it. And, I'd do it again (although I freely admit I certainly wouldn't want to!!).
-Chicago29
