Braces after a breakup

[kellyb]

vegathestar, i think you have missed the point that she is already in braces.

[NickelNikki]

Firstly I'm sorry to hear about your breakup. It must be difficult for you, but I'll qoute the cliche and say that it does get easier with time and meeting new people.

I was in a similair situation, I was in a long term relationship and engaged to someone when I first decided on maybe possibly probably getting braces. At that point I was that comfortable in my relationship that I didn't contemplate the effect on my relationship.

Then we split up - well, he stopped speaking to me entirely, so I took that as a break up. I got out there and began to date all different people, which in itself was scary enough, but right after the break up I developed acne which made me terrified that all of my dates would think me ugly. As it happened none of them commented once on it, nor even seemed that bothered by it in their actions if they noticed it at all. That convinced me that other people aren't as closely analytical of our appearance as we ourselves are.

I'm now in a wonderful new relationship of a few months and I'll be getting my braces next week. I've been warning my boyfriend like crazy about the lisping and spitting that'll be going on with the type of braces I'm getting, but he's said he doesn't mind, and he actualy sympathizes a bit (turns out he had braces when he was younger too!).

My boyfriend has a little metal wire behind his teeth for his bridge, and I honestly actually kinda like it. It's part of him, and I like all of him, and I can only presume that he'll feel the same way about my braces.

So, the too long, didn't read version:

We analyze ourselves more closely and critically than anybody else ever will. People see you as a full picture, they don't just zoom in on your mouth all of the time.

[tmroy79]

My fiance is wonderfully supportive about my braces too. I think its because he knows how much better I will feel and look afterwards. There are guys out there that are willing to deal with it. You just have to find the right one. And honestly, if they won't, they probably are the right guy for you anyway. It seems kinda shallow to not date someone just because they have braces.

[Nancita]

Dating did cross my mind, but if men accepted me for my not so perfect smile then braces should be a problem! Good luck!

[trisportgirl]

I got out there and began to date all different people, which in itself was scary enough, but right after the break up I developed acne which made me terrified that all of my dates would think me ugly.

I find it so funny that you mentioned acne - the same thing happened to me! If braces weren't bad enough, the combination is even worse. Fortunately I've been on two dates since then, the first one he didn't even mention my braces, and the second just asked when I got them and said he remembered how terrible they were when he had them. So far so good, and the acne is starting to go away too (after I renewed my old prescription cream...)!

[preston]

You will find the right person.

[Porge]

I'm sorry about the breakup trisportgirl. That must be tough after such a long time together. Your braces shouldn't be a big deal to any man. If he can't see the woman behind the braces then he is hardly worth your time. If you are online dating I don't think you need to specifically mention it, your picture would more than likely reflect your appearance including your braces so they should already be aware of them. In my humble opinion though, you shouldn't be thinking about dating or what other men think right now. Give it some time, let your braces do what they do, enjoy Toronto and maybe you will meet someone new. Maybe you will still have braces, maybe you won't

[roxie2519]

P.S my boyfriend was the one who suggested that I shoul get braces... so I did and now he is more excited than me.. lol

[MisterChris]

Last August I got braces at 40 and going into it was pretty much accepting of the fact that the next 12-18th months (my sentence) would be spent without any kind of a dating life. In fact during my first appointment with my ortho when I was getting the impressions and x-rays done I joked about becoming a monk and joining a monastery for the next year and a half because who would want to date a 40-year old in braces? Quite surprisingly the reactions I have been getting from women are 100% positive. They would ask "Wow, are you wearing braces?" which would soon be followed up with something to the effect of "That's so cool!" or something of that nature and perhaps a story about how they wish they had the guts to do it themselves. If anything I feel that it has actually improved my dating prospects!!! I attribute it to three reasons...First it serves as an ice breaker and women actually initiate conversations with me by asking about my braces. Second, they are impressed that have the determination to go through with it and obviously care about myself enough to do it at 40. And most importantly, as I see my teeth get progressively better and better as time goes on, my self confidence also goes up and I'm sure others can sense that.

[kellyb]

Last August I got braces at 40 and going into it was pretty much accepting of the fact that the next 12-18th months (my sentence) would be spent without any kind of a dating life. In fact during my first appointment with my ortho when I was getting the impressions and x-rays done I joked about becoming a monk and joining a monastery for the next year and a half because who would want to date a 40-year old in braces? Quite surprisingly the reactions I have been getting from women are 100% positive. They would ask "Wow, are you wearing braces?" which would soon be followed up with something to the effect of "That's so cool!" or something of that nature and perhaps a story about how they wish they had the guts to do it themselves. If anything I feel that it has actually improved my dating prospects!!! I attribute it to three reasons...First it serves as an ice breaker and women actually initiate conversations with me by asking about my braces. Second, they are impressed that have the determination to go through with it and obviously care about myself enough to do it at 40. And most importantly, as I see my teeth get progressively better and better as time goes on, my self confidence also goes up and I'm sure others can sense that.

though i am currently in braces and am in a relationship, if i wasn't in braces and was single, i would have no issues with dating a guy with braces for exactly same reasons you have mentioned.

one of my male co-workers who is 24 was thinking of getting braces but decided not to because he was worried about dating. i told him to go for it but at the same time i could really understand his concerns as perhaps the younger women he would be going after might think differently from the women a 40 year old male will date.

[trisportgirl]

I'm feeling a lot better about my braces now, mostly because I got through my first post-breakup make out session without any mishaps, and my date evidently didn't have any issues with my braces... I'm learning (despite everyone telling me this already) that my braces really do look cute and that it demonstrates that I care about my looks and health, and that I am brave enough to do it!

Thanks everyone for being so supportive - we all have our down moments and it's great to know if have awesome people backing me up when i just need to be told ONE MORE TIME that I made the right decision.

[ITALIANNYC]

Personally I believe that if you actually need braces, your subconsciously not showing your teeth as much as you would like 2 anyway so whats the difference L?ets not kid ourselves, if most of us had a nice smile and good teeth, we wouldnt need braces in the first place.

So ask yourself this question.. Would you rather date someone who has bad teeth, or someone who has braces on bettering themselves and doing something about it?

Dont worry about what people think. Last time I checked, A beautiful person is a beautiful person, with or without braces.

[Mylene]

I'm a guy. I think more guys find adult braces attractive, or at least cute, than ya'll realize. If single, I would definitely date a girl with braces; wouldn't bother me a bit. My wife has Invisalign, and I love the little brackets on her teeth. Try not to worry about it too much.

That's an awesome response and I bet a lot of other guys feel that way too. Guys keep telling me I look cute in them...! So I'm sure you look adorable in them and that will definitely not stop the right guy from being interested!

[OldBikerBag]

I think way too much thought goes into this question. Personally, I would rather date someone who is doing something to improve their teeth than someone with cruddy, crooked teeth who seem to not care about their hygiene.

I went and got braces on my teeth without telling most of my close knit circle of friends. Just showed up at our hangout with them on one day. One of my girl friends is excited about the possibility of getting braces as an adult. Her ol' man is ready to plop the money down to "git-r-dun" and waggles his eyebrows up and down at her. It's hilarious.

Anyway, the reception I've gotten is nothing but positive, even in an alternate culture. My personal opinion is, if you don't like seeing braces on this ol' lady's teeth, don't waste your time looking. I'm proud of my braces and don't mind showing them off.

[Jerseygirl]

I'm a month in and 99% of the people I speak to don't even realize I am wearing braces.
That said - I have ceramics on top with non-color ligs, so I'm not calling a lot of attention to my brackets.

I am single - and in my mid 40s so obviously I'm still a very eligible woman. Anyone who would be turned off at my braces isn't worth my time.

It's actually an excellent way to weed out the good guys from the jerky boys! I should have done this sooner!