some people just don't understand...

This is the place to post general questions and comments about all areas of orthodontic treatment. Before you post a question, use the forum's SEARCH tool to see if your question has already been answered!

New Members: YOU MUST MAKE A POST WITHIN 24 HOURS OF REGISTERING OR YOUR ACCOUNT WILL BE DELETED. In other words, don't sign up unless you plan to actively participate in the message board immediately. This is necessary to keep out spammers and lurkers with bad intentions. Of course, you can read most forums on the board without registering.

DO NOT POST FULL-FACE PHOTOS or personal contact information on this website. We have had problems with people re-posting members' photos on fetish websites. Please only post photos of your teeth, not your whole face. Keep your email and your personal information private. Thank you.

Moderator: bbsadmin

Message
Author
isthistaken
Posts: 678
Joined: Sat Mar 02, 2013 10:07 pm

Re: some people just don't understand...

#16 Post by isthistaken »

BracesChick wrote:I hate this too. No one really understands. My husbands grandmother called me vain. That hurt. Others have said that it's a lot of money when my teeth looked fine to them. I don't care what they think anymore, although it hurts my feelings, I'm doing this for me, because I'm my worse critic. I do have 2nd thoughts though!
2nd, 3rd and 99th thoughts are normal. Especially at first I vacillated quite a bit.

User avatar
Tobilei
Posts: 1613
Joined: Tue Nov 20, 2012 8:46 pm

Re: some people just don't understand...

#17 Post by Tobilei »

My father in law told my husband we didn't need to be wasting money on me and should be concentrating on our kids but has been supportive since they've been put on.

The only other person who said anything was my Mum who told me my teeth weren't that bad and didn't really need braces. Now she just doesn't talk about them. If I mention them she kind of nods and changes the subject. She doesn't get excited when I show her the changes, she just doesn't want to talk about it so I don't.

My little brother has been great. The only negative thing he ever said to me was "no one should ever put metal in their mouth in my opinion, it just hurts too much" and that was when he was encouraging me to get invisalign. He's been great now they're in though.

No one else has said a word to me about them.

User avatar
BracesChick
Posts: 118
Joined: Sat Feb 16, 2013 3:39 pm
Location: USA

Re: some people just don't understand...

#18 Post by BracesChick »

Tobilei wrote:My father in law told my husband we didn't need to be wasting money on me and should be concentrating on our kids but has been supportive since they've been put on.

The only other person who said anything was my Mum who told me my teeth weren't that bad and didn't really need braces. Now she just doesn't talk about them. If I mention them she kind of nods and changes the subject. She doesn't get excited when I show her the changes, she just doesn't want to talk about it so I don't.

My little brother has been great. The only negative thing he ever said to me was "no one should ever put metal in their mouth in my opinion, it just hurts too much" and that was when he was encouraging me to get invisalign. He's been great now they're in though.

No one else has said a word to me about them.
I'm sorry your father in law was such an @ss! You are just as important as anyone else. I wonder why your mum is so quiet about them? My younger brother is supportive too. He got braces as a kid and happy that I've finally got mine. He's been so helpful and I can complain to him when I'm in pain. He's not so good with advice since It's been 10 years since his came off.

No one else has said anything? My entire circle of friends and family have all voiced their opinion and toughs. Some great, some not so nice.

My beautiful niece will be 6 in August, and everytime I see her (every 2-4 weeks) she says "Aunti, what are those things on your teeth for?"

Eternal
Posts: 11
Joined: Fri Jun 29, 2012 2:21 pm

Re: some people just don't understand...

#19 Post by Eternal »

So is "character" a nice way of saying terrible teeth?

If you knew twins and one of them had crooked teeth, would that make him more interesting somehow?

amyhenna
Posts: 83
Joined: Mon Mar 04, 2013 8:55 am

Re: some people just don't understand...

#20 Post by amyhenna »

Before my nose job, people said the same thing. I don't want a character nose. I don't want character teeth. I just want to BE a character :lol: :lol:

busy bee
Posts: 78
Joined: Mon Feb 25, 2013 3:28 am

Re: some people just don't understand...

#21 Post by busy bee »

I'm not the only one then! I think it's right though that some people are jealous that you're actually doing something to better yourself. And, they certainly will be jealous when I have a perfectly straight smile to show off! I hope everyone on here realises what a fantastic thing they are doing for themselves. And, it's good we've got a place like this to have a good moan!

User avatar
Tobilei
Posts: 1613
Joined: Tue Nov 20, 2012 8:46 pm

Re: some people just don't understand...

#22 Post by Tobilei »

BracesChick wrote:
I'm sorry your father in law was such an @ss! You are just as important as anyone else. I wonder why your mum is so quiet about them? My younger brother is supportive too. He got braces as a kid and happy that I've finally got mine. He's been so helpful and I can complain to him when I'm in pain. He's not so good with advice since It's been 10 years since his came off.

No one else has said anything? My entire circle of friends and family have all voiced their opinion and toughs. Some great, some not so nice.

My beautiful niece will be 6 in August, and everytime I see her (every 2-4 weeks) she says "Aunti, what are those things on your teeth for?"
Lol he's actually lovely, we get along great, I think he was just worried at the time that maybe we'd fix my teeth and not the twins (I also have a 13 year old in braces so braces times 4 equals lots of money). My teeth weren't horrendous or anything, a lot of the problems were at the back but were starting to cause problems at the front so I guess he thought they didn't really need it.

And nope, I don't really socialize a whole lot. I more have acquaintences than close friends, but those I do have haven't said much (one of them said something about how horrible they'd be but that's it).

And aww, kids are cute, I guess she's curious.

isthistaken
Posts: 678
Joined: Sat Mar 02, 2013 10:07 pm

Re: some people just don't understand...

#23 Post by isthistaken »

I also think some people are just taken aback because it's kind of unusual so they blurt something out.

User avatar
BracesChick
Posts: 118
Joined: Sat Feb 16, 2013 3:39 pm
Location: USA

Re: some people just don't understand...

#24 Post by BracesChick »

amyhenna wrote:Before my nose job, people said the same thing. I don't want a character nose. I don't want character teeth. I just want to BE a character :lol: :lol:
Your getting a full makover. :-) Nose job is my next big change. I'm hoping for that by time I'm 35. Lasic done, braces in progress, and next nose job. :-)

Ashybear
Posts: 83
Joined: Tue Jun 05, 2012 4:55 am
Location: Gold Coast, Australia
Contact:

Re: some people just don't understand...

#25 Post by Ashybear »

I'm glad I'm not the only one that hates it when people say it adds character. I have to say though that apart from that one comment ("don't get braces, crooked teeth add character" etc) I've only gotten positive comments! To my face at least..

catphones
Posts: 28
Joined: Fri Apr 26, 2013 7:02 am

Re: some people just don't understand...

#26 Post by catphones »

Argh, I absolutely hate those Character comments too! That, and people dictating what an adult should and shouldn't spend their hard-earned money on, it's just such an incredibly negative outlook on life. It's like there's a list of acceptable things an adult should want in their lives, but braces don't make the cut... way to rain on someone's parade :(

I'm finally going to make an appointment to see an orthodontist for a consultation, after 7 years of "you won't want braces in college" and "you're too old for them anyway!" "Your teeth aren't that bad," And of course "Do you really want to spend that much?"

paulas1
Posts: 49
Joined: Tue Apr 09, 2013 5:06 am

Re: some people just don't understand...

#27 Post by paulas1 »

My boyfriends mother seems to take real issue with me getting my braces on. She keeps making comments about how she doesn't see the point. She says that her children don't have the straightest teeth (either does she) and that they never had to get them.
My own mother might go for her some day!

I think people are just jealous because they don't have the courage it takes to get adult braces. But we'll never look back once we have lovely straight teeth!

Fluffy
Posts: 31
Joined: Fri Apr 26, 2013 11:11 am

Re: some people just don't understand...

#28 Post by Fluffy »

I kind of had a reverse experience: I had the chance to get free braces as a kid but turned it down since I had a dental phobia and just couldn’t handle the thought of going through with it. As an adult I thought about having it done for more than ten years before finally deciding to go through with it
- and this was the reaction I got from my sister in law:
She said she couldn’t understand why I didn’t get it done as a child and if it had been up to her, her child would never have been allowed to say no (she has also used my teeth as a scare example towards her kid). Not exactly the kind of support you’re hoping for when you’ve finally gotten to the point of deciding to get them fixed.

busy bee
Posts: 78
Joined: Mon Feb 25, 2013 3:28 am

Re: some people just don't understand...

#29 Post by busy bee »

Fluffy wrote:(she has also used my teeth as a scare example towards her kid). Not exactly the kind of support you’re hoping for when you’ve finally gotten to the point of deciding to get them fixed.
That would really upset me! I do find it incredible that other people think it's any of their business. I think it's fine to be interested and showing support is great but what upset me about the reaction I got from a member of my family was the negativity.

It has to be said though that most people have either been indifferent or really supportive. My parents have been a bit quiet about the whole thing I think because they probably feel a bit upset that they didn't get my teeth sorted out when I was a child.

Fluffy
Posts: 31
Joined: Fri Apr 26, 2013 11:11 am

Re: some people just don't understand...

#30 Post by Fluffy »

Yeah, I was also quite taken aback about it and didn’t know how to respond at the time so I just ended up shrugging it off although later on I thought about how insensitive it was - but thankfully I haven’t heard any negativity since then.

I’m also surprised about the experience others have had on here when their friends or family react negatively to them spending money on braces when they can afford it
– I just don’t understand why they feel the need to be critical about what others choose to spend their own money on

Post Reply